Bladen Joel

This morning, after only about an hour of labor, Bladen Joel Johnson joined our family. He is 18 inches long and 7 lb. 4 oz. in weight. His head is full of black hair, and he is a rosy pink color. I've not seen his toes or counted his fingers, but what I have seen so far is perfect.

Erin went so fast in her labor that she didn't even get an epidural. She looks radiant and calm, and her face lit up the room when Dana came in with big sister Elizabeth. Both sets of grandparents are in attendance, so there is plenty of support for these first few days.

What the future holds for Bladen is yet to be seen; but I do know he will be happy and loved - taught to honor and follow God, and probably be quite the sportsman. He is already filling our family with love and joy.

Confrontation

I'm not good at confrontation. Never have been - don't see that changing any time soon. I have a person I need to talk to - hopefully she won't see it as a confrontation; I'd like to think of it as an opportunity to clear up some misunderstandings about some little things, but to me, it's all the same. I have to be assertive, but respectful; firm but compliant. Not always easy to juggle with this foot-in-mouth disease I tend to have.

I've tried for two days, and we haven't been able to get together. Hopefully, Monday. I just hope I can relax and let it go until then, so I can enjoy my holiday with my family.

Counting down the days!

Well, it's the week of Thanksgiving, and everyone is all in a tizzy. The kids at school, friends at church, and my family can only talk about the coming days! Whose house, favorite pie, playing and visiting with cousins and other relatives... such a happy time.

Growing up, getting together with my cousins was the happiest time for me. I have such wonderful memories of how we played from dawn till dusk, and then stayed up late into the night, not wanting to waste time sleeping. Now, it's my daughters, Gregg, and Liz that I want to spend every precious moment with in the coming days. Those memories are growing by leaps and bounds!!

We wait for Bladen. He is ready and in position, and his clothes, room, and bags are ready for his signal that his birth is emminent. Erin is hoping to enjoy the Thanksgiving Feast at her aunt's on Thursday before he decides to come, but we are anxious to see him at any time! What are we in store for with this little man?!?
A whole new world of excitement and joy is soon to awaken!!

Please pray for a safe, quick and joyous delivery for Bladen Joel Johnson and his mother. They mean the world to me!!

Dave vs. American greed

Yesterday, my GMC Envoy turned over 100,000 miles. It's paid for.

Most of society and the car dealerships would be drooling as I passed by their dealerships and offering me great deals.

Ha! Dave has made me see the light. I'm a happy woman!!

May it go many, many more miles!!!

Things He's Missed

On this day 19 years ago, my father died.

Some years, the day goes by without my thinking of it; others, it's all I think of. This is one of those years; I'm thinking about all the things in my life that have happened in that time, and it makes me so sad that he has not been here.

Here are some of the biggies:
my home. We built it from the ground up, and daddy would have loved watching every board go into place.
my daughters graduating from college. It was my dad's dream for me to get my degree, and he was so very proud to see me walk the stage.
Erin marrying Gregg. On our wedding day, as Daddy walked me down the aisle, he patted my hand and kept saying, "it's all so beautiful, Amy. You did such a good job!" My dad was not a man of a lot of words, so it meant the world to me. He bawled his eyes out afterwards.
Andy becoming an elder. He would have been proud.
Casey growing up to be a good worker and responsible man.
Elizabeth being born. I wish he could pull her down the road in the red wagon. He whistled and sang a lot, and she'd love that about him. When I was in labor with Dana, he joined Andy and me in the ride to the hospital and never left for one minute until she was here.

He would be 89 now had he lived.

I miss my Dad.

Eleanor Rigby

Andy and Robert do visitation most Monday nights. They drop in - a "cold visit", they call it - and spend a few minutes listening to the cares and concerns of those who let them in. The visit can be spurred by a problem the person is having, or the fact that they haven't been to worship in a while, or just because they are on the fringe of the congregation. While they are out, I stay at home and go about my evening after a hard day at school.

"All the lonely people, where to they all come from...
All the loney people, where DO they all belong?"

Today, I went with Andy to a garage sale at the home of one of out members. She was selling pews from the original church building here in Pleasanton, and we've been wanting one for a while. The member is chronically ill, and does not get out. Today, she told me that she cannot even go to see her mother because of the flu everywhere.

After we chose our pew, I decided to stay a while and visit some more. The guilt of my neglect was weighing hard on my shoulders, and I just had to spend some time with this woman. The joy with which she greeted me shamed me, and as I left, her call of "I love you!" almost broke me.

"All the lonely people...."

Forgive my lack of compassion. Forgive my laziness.

A fun thought

One of the drawing points for Dana and Erin to attend Texas A & M was the large group of friends from church who were also students there. They went with some familiar faces already in place, which makes moving to such a big place a little easier. They roomed with some, and built many more memories to add to the ones they already had. It also made for security on this mama's part.

Fast forward to tomorrow. Carl and Lisa Royal welcomed Blakely into their family. As I listened to her Grandma Darla talk about her, I thought, "Someday, she could be at A&M with Bladen!" A long-time connection renewed years down the line? Weeklongs, after-game devos, week-end trips to Pleasanton?!

We'll see. I'll get back to you in 18 years!

Wishes

Things I'm wishing for right now:

~ a safe arrival of a healthy Bladen Joel Johnson
~ the answer to Dana's dream come true (my vision?)
~ self-control
~ the safety for our country that I grew up with
~ no more falls for Mom
~ a comfortable retirement in the near future
~ many happy hours with Liz
~ rain
~ a renewed relationship with my brother
~ an active, productive Small Group
~ a safe tour of duty for Tyler
~ Peace for Jackie
~ self-control (yes, I know I've already said that)
~ happiness for my students
~ many more years with Andrew
~ one more ring for Tim, Tony, and Manu!!

The weekend in review

Had a lovely time in Houston - again. We arrived at Dana's apartment with time to spare before falling into bed, and then activities began.

Dana and Andrew got up and headed out for a belated Birthday breakfast. She took him to her favorite place, and then they went to a museum exhibit on the 40th anniversary of the landing on the moon. I was invited to go, but Andy and I don't really do well together at museums... he is a meticulous reader of all things exhibited, and I scan and go. Both parties deemed it a success.

While they took in culture and science, I shopped for Bladen's shower gift and a book for Liz. Never had been to a Babies R Us, and am glad there isn't one in Pleasanton!! I decided a checkbook is not a good thing to take when the amount to spend is open-ended; from now on, I only go in with cash!

After shopping, I arrived at the Johnson home. Once Liz woke up, we had a good reunion (she looks like "Who are you and why are you here so sporadically??" She warmed up pretty quickly this time, and I have to say the highlight of my afternoon was when she was singing. Such a precious sound to my ears! If only I could have recorded it!! Her other grandparents arrived, as did Andy and Dana, so then the sharing began.

One down side to the weekend was that Roark, Liz's canine brother, reacted to some flea repellent, and ended up in the ER for dogs. He is okay now, but it was a downer for the weekend.

Sunday was worship, and then the shower. Lots and lots and LOTS of little boy clothes, so she is set for the first few months. Diapers were the other hit of the day, and those were received very graciously! One we got things back to the house, we hugged, kissed, and said out good-byes.

So, now we wait. Thanksgiving is in two weeks, and then Bladen is scheduled to arrive soon afterward. We are all ready to meet this little man and see what joy he adds to our growing family!!

An amazing thought

One thing that has always amazed me is that different teachers are drawn to different kids. A co-worker and I share a room, and we also share some kids through-out the day. I see her with a young man that I would have killed the second week - day - of the year, and she deals with him SO beautifully! He pushes my buttons just watching him with her, and yet she stays so calm and collected. I have a couple of little ones that affect her the same way. I guess it's a good thing that every kid has some teacher along the way that loves them and deals with their little quirks...

Which makes me transition to the church. How many times you see people drawn to certain personalities and avoid others. And yet, we are called to love each other equally. Sometimes, a hard task to take on. I have a couple of people that I just have a hard, hard time with - and I feel terribly about it. I just try to remember that there are those out among me who feel that way about me!! Shame on me -

The guy in Chicago....

I know you have been hearing about the guy in Chicago who has (at this count) 11 bodies of women in his yard and home. These guys fascinate me, and there have been times when I have taught children that I think will someday be involved in the same activities. Jeffrey Dahmer was a tortured soul, and his life of cruelty and hatred will be studied for the rest of time.

So, how do we get smarter than these men? Where in their childhood was the breaking point of the soul; the decision that it is their right and priviledge to do what they do to another human being? I had a neighbor growing up who, when they had a cat give birth to a litter, filled up a tub and drowned each and every one. He didn't grow up to be a killer, but the other factors were not in place.

I don't know that this post even has a point to it; I just had this on my mind. I guess the fascination I have is partially a hope that I can pick up on some little one and make that part of his heart go the right direction. A big task, but I'm willing....

November 1

How in the world did it get to be November already?!? I love turning calendars to the next month, and it seems like I just did October the other day.... with so much going on, I guess the days go quicker than ever, and with Bladen's arrival almost eminent, I'd better just get ready for it to be December!

We had a good weekend; Andy wanted to just "veg out", and so we did. I slept in; no surprise there - Andy watched some college sports and his beloved PBS This Old House Hour. Trick or Treaters visited us in groups, and then it was time for the SPURS. Manu was the "hit" of the game, with the "batting" down of the bat, and we turned in early after setting our clocks back. It was a peaceful, relaxing day.

This week, I have a couple of second graders to screen for dyslexia, but the week should be calmer after celebrating Red Ribbon Week. That, plus Book Fair, and Halloween, had the kids hyper and the teachers tired. I'm hoping for calmer, quieter days!

So - that's it. Hope you had a good weekend, and that your week is all you need it to be.

Things I like about my job -

When you are a "real" teacher (i.e. - classroom), and then move out to become "Support Staff", it is a real adjustment. Now, I haven't been a "real" teacher in some time, but even my shift to my current position has caused me to find new and more appreciated levels of work:

1. I get to actually talk to my students. Homeroom teachers do not have the luxury of having conversation with their students. I know this because, when I ask them things about their students, they look at me like they have no idea what is going on. Teaching now is about curriculum and scores, not children.

2. No duty. Enough said!

3. No grades, and for me, no lesson plans!! My curriculum is set so rigidly, I just follow the manual and go from there. (Can be boring, so I try to come up with some variants)

4. No grading. See above.

5. I'm not going to say no discipline problems, because I do have some, but a lot of it is referred back to the homeroom teacher or office. I just have my little 45 minutes, and that's enough with some children!!

6. 45 minutes a group and they move on!!

7. I get to laugh at the kids; we have a relationship all it's own. I'm lucky and, and I hope they feel the same way!!


So, in the twilight of my career, I have the dream job. It makes life a lot easier!!

Camping with Dana and other highlites of the weekend -

For the second time in several weeks, Dana has been our hostess as we invaded Houston. She is a gracious, welcoming hostess, and shares her apartment with us openly.

As I look around at her life away from me, I see so much of her and what is important to her; friends, family, special times, God. (Perhaps I should not have listed Him last, for He is certainly not last to Dana!) Her home is comfortable and happy, filled with all the things that comfort and enhance her life. We appreciate her willingness to let us move in and stay a while!!

The weekend was memorable. Erin and Gregg put on quite a first party for Elizabeth, and she was a trooper!! Went to everyone and took it all in stride. While the concept of the candle was obviously lost on her, it marked for us a celebration of a wonderful year; first everything - tooth, sitting up, solid food, smiles; you name it, we celebrated it. And while my mother and father in law were not able to attend, you could see their legacy all around. Bladen, growing strong deep inside Erin, pointed to the future. It was a day all of us will hold on to.

The Johnson family was happy to be there; our lives have blended pretty well over these past 6 years. We are greatful to them for raising such a fine man as Gregg and for loving our daughter and welcoming her into their tiny (by LaMore standards of number!) family.

And then the weekend ended; too soon as usual. But we plan to return, November 7, for the shower awaiting Erin and Bladen. We anticipate his joining us very soon!!

A GREAT day to be a teacher!!

Here's how my day ended:

Student: "Mrs. LaMore, how long have you had this job?" (Uh-oh, I think to myself!)

Me: "Teaching dyslexia classes? Hmmm, about 4 years of doing it full-time. Why?"

Student: "Well, you're pretty good at it!" Delivered matter-of-factly.

I grin - then he goes straight for the heart:

"I'm pretty sure it's because of you that I passed the TAKS Reading test last year."

"Thanks, ________. I appreciate that!" as my heart swells full beyond measure.


Makes getting up a lot easier tomorrow morning!

To be a Nana -

I want to wish my Liz a Happy Birthday - one day late. Yesterday was her 1st birthday, and my phone visit with her and Erin was so fun!! On speaker phone, I told her all sorts of silly Nana things, and Erin told me she was trying to push all the buttons to talk back. I understand that she really enjoyed her celebratory cup cake, but not so much the hat... I cannot wait to see how she handles the big family part coming up this weekend!

Everyone told me that I'd love grandchildren, and they were right. I can't look at a little boy now, without anticipating who Bladen will be, and how he will anchor himself to our hearts. My own grandmothers loved me with all their hearts; and Mamaw had 20 of us to love!! Combing her long, graying hair, going to the store to spend my valued dollar with her, getting letters from her that encouraged me and told me each time just how much she loved me are only a microscopic portion of her influence in my life - how I hated it when she left us at only 70 years!! My Grandma Annie was a hoot; a funny little Dutch German woman, who burned the sugar cookies and somehow still made them taste like gold! When I would spend the night with her, she'd pull me to the floor while she said the rosary - her false teeth clattering along with the rosary beads.

So, here we are at the beginning of my Grandmotherhood - the future is full of ways for me to show Liz and Bladen how dear they are to me, and all the fun stuff only Nana's get to do.

Elizabeth; thank you for opening the door to this next portion of my life - as your Aunt Dana would always say; "You are first!"

I really wish I didn't think of these things -

Had a lovely, sweet visit with my cousin Randall and his Linda this weekend. They were passing through, and we had lunch together. Broke out the grandbaby pictures, and vacation pictures. Had good laughs and sweet memories. I really wish I lived closer to them....

Later, Andrew and I drove to SA. He was hungry for shrimp and those delicious biscuits at Red Lobster, and I'll always take a good steak (Different blog for a different day!), so we went up. Did some birthday shopping for Miss Liz, and then went to dinner.

Somewhere along the route from Pleasanton to SA, in some conversation that I can't remember, this came out of my mouth; "In 15 years, I'll be 70."

15 years - are you kidding me?!?! Do you know how fast 15 years flies by?!? I wanted to put on the brakes, reverse, and take that thought out of my mind - it keeps reverberating over and over the past two days - 15 years to 70.

Now, I know. None of us are guaranteed 70 years, but my dad and my grandmother both died in their 70th year, and that is just coming too soon! Erin will be 42 - Dana, 45. Liz will be a teenager, and so will Bladen.

Breathe, Amy. Enjoy today - anticipate good years, but don't focus on the realization. Don't look back at how fast the last 15 years have passed - just relax.

Thy will be done.

Only half a pill!

I've shared before about my phobia towards the dentist chair. I, at one point, required music, gas, and a "happy pill" to even get me in the office - many years went by while my teeth suffered and I avoided the inevitable. Even now, the memories of some of those visits make me quiver with nerves!!

But last year, I decided, "You are 53 years old - get over it!" That decision, along with my dentist no longer having the invaluable nitrous oxide to comfort me, has gotten me to my visit today. I have all but two repairs done - a victory of sorts - and today, when I go get the next part of my new crown, I will be going on only half a happy pill! Two reasons - I don't want to sleep tonight and tomorrow away in a stuper, and I want to wean myself off totally. I trust my sweet Dr. David, who is so patient with me, and so I reach this milestone. I'm not sure I can do the last big appointment without it, but for today, it's a plan. Keep me in your thoughts as I take this step -

I'm hoping to one day be his patient of the month!!!

Ray's sermon

This past Sunday, Ray spoke on discipleship. He spoke to us about the commitment we make at baptism, so be a true follower of the Christ. To face the unimaginable and stand up for Who it is we believe in, rather than the everyday "I'm a Christian" talk we may or may not own up to. When the sermon turned to even facing death at the hand of a non-believer, for the first time in my life, I really felt compelled to consider that happening. Growing up in unconquerable America, I've never considered the fact that this is a possiblity, and now - with so many people arming themselves with the express point to taking us out, I felt threatened.

At dinner later, some friends were talking, and I said that I don't think we will be taken over by someone even expected by us as an enemy, but rather from the south, or some rebel nut with a cause. I think I miss the old Cold War - at least we had a face to fear!

So, while this isn't the most encouraging post of my blog, please consider it. Is your discipleship firm and committed? I hope so; I'm looking forward to our spending eternity together!

For the most part....

I am a happy person. I have a lot of wonderful things in my life, things that - while I wasn't arrogant enough to expect them, I wasn't surprised when they happened. I have a husband that keeps on going with me, even though after all this time, I think he's going to realize one day that I'm not "all that" and leave me for someone else. He says he still likes to hold my hand above all else - how sweet is that ?!? Sometimes, I think I want to leave me; to run away and make his life better.... but I'm not strong enough to do it.

I have two daughters that wrote the book on loving their mom. Erin and I have learned together how to manage the "married-daughter-too-many-phone-calls" situation, and I think we've done pretty good! My son-in-law hasn't blown a gasket yet, anyway!! Dana still takes it in stride when I treat my first-born like she is Liz's age and not a grown woman, and even though I try to realize it; she'll always be my baby girl.

My church family loves me unconditionally (I think, anyway!) What a blessing they are to me in my walk with our Lord - Andy and I don't even speculate about leaving after retirement; where could we go away from our family? Who could love us as much?!?

So that leaves work and me. Work is good; I like my kids and my co-workers, but I am looking forward to someday soon being able to walk away and be a full-time Nana. With Dave Ramsey helping us, it won't be long.

Now, if I could just get myself together. As year 55 approaches, I see so much in my self that I have great need to fix. Everyday things that, I go to bed with great resolve of repairing, and wake to the morning with just dealing with the day. I really, really want to back up the years, and redo some things - and since that's not likely to happen, I'll just deal with one thing at a time.

I just hope I have patience with myself to get it done.