This Sunday will mark the 3 month date of my surgery! While it seems to be going by fast, and my life improves daily, there are times when my "previous life" feel eons ago.
Some days, I am so angry - at other people for being able to eat "normally", but mostly at myself. Where was this determination so many pounds ago?!? Where was my desire to be healthier and more active when I could have kept this from being a neccessity; where was my desire to be able to wear beautiful clothes, to shop for fun things to wear instead of what I could find that would fit?? Why didn't I care enough about myself and my family until I almost ruined it all....
These are hard questions to face. I know, the hysterectomy and dead thyroid didn't help, and Dr. Cruz pointed out that I most likely have the "fat" gene, but over all, this is my doing. Or lack of...
But - those days are behind me now. I am learning to adjust to my new way of life, and everyone is there for me, cheering me on. For that, I am grateful beyond measure!
Now, if I can just cheer for myself.
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1 comment:
I can not read this without tears. I know this has been a struggle. No one but one who has gone through this can truly understand but we sympathize with your plight.
I am so proud of the decisions you are making in your life and I can see that overall are healthier and happier.
God has blessed you with a second chance!
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