Happy Birthday, Graves C. Young, Jr.

  This is from my wedding on May 22, 1976.  It's how I choose to think of Daddy on the date of his birth in 1920. 

 I don't go to the cemetery very often; it's been over a year now... I just don't go.  Daddy and Mama are not there, and all I do is stand there a minute and think about those sad days of their funerals.  I'd rather stay at home, or sit on a pew and sing, or hold a grandbaby and remember them at those times.

  I chose this picture from probably a hundred because this was probably one of Daddy's favorite days.  As far as I can remember, it's one of the only times I saw him in a suit, and he was so proud.  Since our wedding was in Huntsville, Andy and I did most of the arrangements, and Daddy wrote checks.  All the way down the aisle, he kept patting my hand and saying, "It's so pretty, Amy!!  It's so pretty!"  When he met up with us in the tiny little room following the ceremony, he took me in his arms and cried his heart out - first time I'd seen that, too.   It kinda stuck with me for some reason....

Of the three of us, I am the most like him.  Physically, I AM a Young.  High waist, long legs, short arms, brown eyes. Cleft in my chin and squared-off end of my nose.  I also have his temperment; long, long fuse that rarely blows, basically even-keeled and love to sing and laugh.  I can hear my mom say, "You are JUST like him!"  Thanks, Mom!

  Mama tells me that he was a "fall-down" drunk when she met him after his years in Hawaii working on airplanes, and that she knew in that moment she would marry him.  Poor guy never had a chance with that May girl.  At their wedding, the Justice of the Peace said, "You may kiss your bride."  Daddy just stood there, and finally, their witness turned to Daddy and said, "Hell, Graves, if you're not going to kiss her, I sure will!"  He sobered up soon afterwards, and I saw him take one drink during the rest of his life.  They loved each other with all their hearts, but it wasn't always happy.  The three of us were their focus, and their marriage was a commitment for life - Daddy worked every day to provide a good life for us, but it wasn't always an indulgent life.  We had the best lawn on the street, and our cars were never in a shop.  Andy can tell you a story about when some repairment dented the new aluminum siding on our house, which was probably one of the very few times Andy saw Daddy mad.

He loved, loved, loved Amanda, Dana, Erin, and Casey.  Miles and miles we walked with them, or pushed them in a swing in the back yard, or pick fresh veggies from his beloved garden or let them "help" him roll his cigarettes on the living room floor.   He whistled all the time, and was at his happiest tinkering in his garage.  After he died, Mama gave Andy the job of clearing it out, and what a job!!  I would go there to "feel him" and to remember who he was there.

  So, Happy Birthday, sweet Daddy.  Today, you would turn 92.  I miss you -