Paradise Valley and more!!

Yesterday, we drove over to Houston to pick up Erin for the trip to the funeral. Usually, their congregation does not meet on Sunday evenings, but last night, they did, so we met them there. They were having a "Singing" - and we got there just as the first song was going.
Their congregation is huge - almost 1,000 members, but last night we met in the chapel. It holds 200, and we sang and sang, and sang some more. New songs, old songs, fast and slow songs. They gave us a chance for requests, so I loudly yelled out "185" and got a lot of laughter... poor Erin. Her mother!! Anyway, my song was the prettiest one we sang - "Jesus, Thy Name I Love." Can't get through it without tearing up. Amazing. Lots of good voices and energy. Good old, 4 part harmony. We even learned a new "round" that made me wish for Jackie.

So, today we head north for visitation, then the funeral is tomorrow afternoon. Erin has to work on Wed., so we will come right back. I'm so glad she is going, but I know all the riding may be hard on her. I promised Gregg I'd take good care of her - and Elizabeth.

Please keep us in your prayers as we travel.

A win-win situation

"Brothers, I do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep,or to grieve like the rest of men who have no hope. We believe the Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him."
1 Thes. 4: 12-14 NIV

If there is a smoking room in Heaven, that is where Aunt Mary is right now, with her beloved sisters and brother, husband, children and parents. They are having the reunion that each one, in their own time, took solace in when facing death. They are lighting up one after another, and the coffee will not stop brewing. They are laughing and loving on each other now just as they did in life. And they are finally together again.
Lenora, Roland, Joyce, Myrna, Margaret, and now, Mary Alice. Uncle Billie, Sandra, Ralph, and Bobby Wayne. Cousin Glenda. My mamaw and papaw. My, what a party they have going on!

My little lamb

Been having trouble falling asleep the past couple of nights. Guess the waiting and worrying over Aunt Mary has played a number on my rest. We are just waiting now; she has a staph infection that has gone to her heart, and at 87 years old, that's about unbeatable. She's strong though - her daughter tells me it took 6 people to hold her down to put in the iv. My aunt is all of 5 feet and 80 pounds, but I hear she's fighting it.
Anyway, last night, I was tossing and turning, singing hymns in my head and not getting anywhere. Finally, one thought calmed me down and let me relax. Elizabeth. I visualized her smiling face and sweet smell, over and over, and soon, I was asleep.

Nice.

What a bunch of dames!!

My mom had 4 sisters. They were called "The May Girls" and were quite the bombshells in the days of WWII. I've seen flirty pictures of them in their swimsuits sitting on soldiers laps that no young, awkward teenage girl should have to see!! They married handsome men and loved each other very, very much.

All of them are gone now, except my Aunt Mary. I got word this morning through the magic of email that she is in ICU in severe pain and bad shape. Doesn't look good. Pray hard, her daughter said.

Aunt Mary married my Uncle Billie and lost her first two children before I was born. They went on and had 5 more kids, the dear cousins I've written about before. Deeann is like my sister in many ways, and when the third sister died, she said to me, "No offense, Amy, but I hope my mom is not the last to go."
Well, she is, and has amazed us all by her health and stamina. Until about the last year, she was putting on her own roof and mowing her yard with a push-mower. She is "Granny" to everyone in her little town, and still took tickets at the basketball games last winter. She is 84.

She never quit - no matter what life handed her. No matter how hard it was to raise all those kids, to bury her husband when so young and never remarry. To bury two little children. To lose all those sisters (and their crazy brother Roland) and her mother and father. Now last year, she lost her son. She never quit.

So, I'd appreciate whatever prayers you would lift up on her behalf. Not so much for her - she's probably ready to leave this world and join those she loves, but for her 4 remaining children, grandkids, great-grandkids, and a niece and nephew or two.

I love dogs. If we had a fence, Andy and I would be at serious war over whether or not to get one... I haven't had one since I was a teenager, but it's not for lack of desire. As awesome as Smudge was, he WAS a cat, and it's not the same. Very rarely do I come across a dog I don't like; such was the case with Bo. He was my sister-in-law's dog, and I disliked him from the first time I saw him. Just never bonded at all those family gatherings. Now, today we get an email saying they had to put him down.

Having had to do that twice in just a few years, I know the anguish of the decision and the loneliness of after the fact. I've never known more surely in my life that putting Smudge down was "for his own good" and eased his suffering - the look in his eyes those last couple of days said more to me than any words could, but it doesn't ease YOUR sadness or loneliness for them.

So, today, as the Fritsche's cope with losing Bo, I'm right there with them. He was part of their family for a long time, and I know their hurt will take a while. Rest in peace, Bo. I hope there's cake for you to eat in dog heaven.

Let the Planning Begin!

Just ask my family - my favorite part of taking a trip is the planning.
When the girls were little and money was quite tight, the planning was essential to make it the best trip for the least amount spent. Now, sweetly, the cash isn't nearly so sparse, and there ARE just two of us going, but I still find the planning to be great fun.

Frankly, due to gas prices, we are not heading to the mountains this summer - as much as we love them. The challenge therefore was to find a place to go that we hadn't done before and wouldn't require a second mortgage. After scanning our great state all over, we decided on the very tip of Texas; the Valley. I've never been there, and we found a great resort on South Padre that offers all sorts of cool stuff.
So, in two weeks, hurricanes allowing, we are heading south to the Valley. Then, I will be able to say I've been to every part of this amazingly diverse state. Sounds like a fun time for all!!

My Previous Life

Growing up, there was a lot of music in my home. Gary and I would put on music and waltz throughout the house, Daddy sang and whistled, and Mama would play the Everly Brothers and the Platters. But best of all were the John Phillip Sousa marches. We would play them on the record player (a big box that had a turntable and arm that held big, black vinyl circles with grooves cut in them, in case you didn't know.), and we would march like soldiers while humming along. It was magical.

I don't believe in reincarnation, but if I did, it would have to be that I was either John Philip or his wife. I can still pretty much "name that tune" on very few introductory notes, and it sets my heart to skipping. Just the energy and power of those chords and harmonies fill me with excitement.
And this weekend, among no other, will be filled with Washington Post, Stars and Stripes Forever, and so on. It is my yearly fix. We actually had an original recording of his band on one of mom's 78 records (those vinyl discs used to come in several speeds.), but it has been lost. I would have loved to have had it.

So, when you hear Stars and Stripes Forever this weekend, think of me!! I'll be somewhere, marching and humming!

Once a mom, always a mom

I get it, mom. All those years of sighing and rolling my eyes when I saw your name on the caller I.D. - I get it now. Erin will get it soon - once a mom, you are ALWAYS a mom.

As soon as they put Dana in my arms the first time, I was her #1 fan for all time. And even though she is a "grown woman," I still worry and pray and dwell on what she is doing each and every day. We had a wonderful visit this past weekend, and I look at her with eyes full of love and pride and admiration, and try to remember that she is not 8 years old. She is competent and independent and very - well, normal. All that rearing that she got has paid off, along with a lot of blessings from people around her. And yet, as she drove off, I worried. Too many news reports and scary novels not to. I'm so glad that God hasn't gotten tired of my asking Him to watch over her in her life; but it's that mom-thing. And I'm glad she is patient with me.

Get ready, Erin. Elizabeth will make you understand like you never would imagine.

Good vs. Evil

Today, I caught the end of the movie "Ever After." It stars Drew Barrymore as Cinderella, and it's one of my favorites. The humor is right up my alley, and the wicked are truly evil. A great flick.
Toward the end of the movie, Cinderella asks her evil step-mother if there was ever a time when she loved her. The woman's response is, "How can a person ever love a pebble in her shoe?", which crushes Cinderella to the core.
It made me think of my mother-in-law. She married Andy's dad shortly after Andy's mother died when he was not yet 5 and his brother 2 years old. She moved into her home, ate off her dishes, and sat on her furniture. She worked to pay of the hospital debt left without a complaint and, without going into too personal information, dealt with relatives on all sides who were non too happy with the marriage.
And she raised Andy and Bruce as her own. The term "step" never was uttered in the house, and the family grew to include two more children. Now, I imagine there were days when being Andy's mother was not fun - after all, his mommy had just died and he had a lot of adjusting to do. And yet, he was her son. She gave up her homeland to become an American in case the boys ever had to go to war and had to fight. She gave up many other things as well, and never complained.
I don't tell her often enough how much I honor her and love her; outside my own grandmother, she is probably one of my earthly heroes. She is 83 now, and she and my father-in-law have had a happy marriage. Just like Cinderella and her prince, they have lived "happily ever after." And they deserve it .

Post # 350 !!

Wow. 350 times I've had something I thought were worth sharing. One day, I'll go back and read them all. Maybe...
The other day, I went to Blockbuster and came home with 10 movies. Haven't rented any all summer, so this is the week to catch up. Yesterday, I watched "The Other Bolyn Girl" with Natalie Portland and Scarlett Johanson. I enjoyed the scenery and the costumes were gorgeous, I think it was the best acting I've seen from Natalie P., but I came away from the story really sad at the mess those people made of their lives because of ambition. It reminded me of the ambitious Father Ralph from the Thorn Birds - how his whole life came to ruin because of his ambition in the Catholic church.
I got to thinking that ambition is one of those character traits that can be either really beneficial or detrimental. How far does someone's ambition go to cause them to ruin either their own lives or the lives of others around them? If you are ambitious, people look up to you as hard-working and confident - unlike unambitious folks who just go-with-the-flow and live life as it comes to them. I think I'll choose to live somewhere in the middle. I don't want to lose my head over it!!

Well, here goes....

I wrote a long, very personal post today and then dumped it. Surfice it to say, it was very therapeutic in nature, and opened my own eyes to some things I do not want to face. I wish I would have had the guts to publish it, but hopefully it served its purpose just seeing it myself. Why is it so very hard to face one's demons?

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice....

Never again will I call her an "it." That's right; Erin and Gregg are having a daughter!! Something inside told me that she was a "he"- but I cannot tell you how very right this feels at this moment. Here are some things I'm pondering at this time:

I am on the search for the perfect rocking chair. It has to be comfy for long stretches of rocking = a good, roomy seat. It cannot scoot across the floor, cannot squeak or moan (no comments here!), and have "adjustable" speeds - quick for fussy, restless baby girls and a slow, quiet speed for a sleeping baby and contented Nana. Any suggestions?

Erin has the most beautiful hair, but I'm thinking this baby needs Gregg's curls. Are blonds ever curly-headed? I don't recall seeing many blonds with natural curls. Hmmm....

My mom would be so happy to know her name. It seems funny now to say it since she's not born yet, but I think I'll adapt. It's a lovely, elegant name honoring women very close to Erin's heart. She will have a lot to live up to... yet there's plenty of room for her own wondrous personality.

Oh, dear. I really sound like a Nana now!!! After I see it in print on Erin's blog, I'll fill you in, but I don't think it's my place to go first. I'm trying very hard to do things the right way here.
Don't want to mess up the visitation priviledges before she's ever here!!

One last thing; she's a big one - all of 12 ounces!!

Hurry up! - Slow down! -

Sunday, for a treat, Andy took me into SA for lunch following morning worship. We rarely eat out, and NEVER drive into town just to eat, so it made me a happy girl. On the way, we got behind some folks who were not in a hurry and we were on a double yellow stripe, so we had to wait until we were able to pass. It didn't hold us up that much, but just the idea of not going 70 was frustrating. I mean, our lunches were there for the picking, and we were behind some old country bumpkins!
Soon enough, we were there enjoying our dinner, not thinking again about the holdup. Later, that night, our minister was talking from the pulpit about how he and his wife had stood just below where he was to be married years before. As he talked about it, his faced transformed into one of wistfullness; of a man whose life has gone by much faster than he'd ever dreamed it would - in fact, he made that statement almost word for word. The moment took him back to his younged life, and you could feel the wistfullness just looking at him. I thought about that morning, how I'd been in such a goofy rush to get somewhere that meant nothing to my life; to not be "too late" having lunch. How foolish....
Now, today I think of my coming granddaughter, Liz. When I look at the ticker on the blog, those days to come seem very far off, and yet I know she will be here before I know it. There is a Star Trek movie we watched the other day where the people on the planet can slow time down, to "hold on" to a moment to fully enjoy it. I hope I figure out how to do that before she is born.
Time. God is so lucky not to be bound by it. I guess we will enjoy that in Heaven.

A little preview

Well, Andy has been at home this week; a little taste of retirement to come. It's been a productive week so far; the list of things to do has been shortened by several items, but there's still lots to do. Hopefully, his next week off will be more recreational !!
We've been very relaxed in our labors - do a little, stop and visit; do some more; eat lunch... you get the drill. Our yard looks great thanks to his efforts, and the cars are all taken care of. Now, I'll be happy to get the bathroom painted in the next couple of days. It's been nice to have him home, and to see how the 24/7 life of retirement will be.

I'm just glad we like to be together after all these years!!

A Day Late

While yesterday was Father's Day, I want to take my time today to reflect on the many wonderful men who have had an influence on my life. I know as soon as I sign off, however, that one or two will pop into my mind, but for now, here goes:



1. My dad. Graves Calvin Young. Mechanic extrordinaire, singer and whistler, loud laugher and champion yard/gardener. I hear him in my head as we speak, and I miss him so very much. Not a man of "words of affirmation" but you knew he loved you and wanted to be with you. He loved his grandchildren even more than the three of us.



2. My father-in-law. Frank LaMore. Has always been kind and helpful. Raised some great kids, especially my husband.



3. Jon Rhodes. College professor/ mentor/ "college dad." He

made a big impact in my life and then broke my heart by divorcing "mama Rhodes." But life goes on, doesn't it?



4. Jon Kelley. Every son should have a father like Jon. Patrick was at his side every step of the way growing up; and he was shown every example of how to serve the Lord's people.



5. Jim Lassiter. Our other college dad. Strong, fun, faithful.



6. Lin Johnson. Gregg's dad. See # 4 An amazing pair of men, who bless my life everyday. My grandchildren are blessed to have them in their lives.



7. Robert Hutton. He is everybody's dad. Watching Jarred as a father is testimony to his influence.



And I have to mention Andrew. I knew he came from a strong family full of high standards, but never dreamed he would be the man he is. His daughters have always been his focus, and our lives are stronger because he is our leader.



So, a late "Happy Father's Day" to all the guys above. Thanks for being part of my life, past, present and future. I hope you know how very much I love you all.

Trust

When the girls were young, we'd talk to them about trust and what all that entailed. We would model that for them by following up on promises and keeping confidences. We made sure that they understood that, once trust was broken, it took a long, long time to build back and relationships were damaged by losing trust in someone. Throughout our marriage, that trust has stayed strong in each other.
This year, in both our jobs, we've lost trust in co-workers. People we felt secure in our professional relationships with have done and said things that have made us wonder if we should have trusted in the first place, and have caused us to change the way we felt about our roles in our jobs. It is a horrible feeling, and for both of us to go through that in the same year has been devistating. It certainly takes away the joy of working with others, and the good we felt we accomplished.
Sure makes retirement look good....

I'm not in High School anymore....

Today, I started a 3 day training in San Antonio with a couple of co-teachers. We left bright and early to be on time, then talked our way past the street and ended up rushing anyway. (Tomorrow will go better !) Anyway, it was a quick day, an hour lunch and out by 3:00. Today was just the overview of the program, so I didn't get a lot of new information, but that's okay. Sometimes, just being around other teachers is enough to invigorate you and get you ready for the coming year.



I learned, however, that "one size doesn't fit all." We are at a High School, sitting in those lovely, hard student desks. Now, I know those big football player boys fit in them, and I fit in them, but by 2:00, I was ready to stand up the rest of the day. And we have two more days. I'm going to have to drag a chair from the teacher workroom and make myself more comfortable, or it's going to be painful. Bad thing is, we are sitting at the back of the classroom, so I'll have to lift it up over the others and make a spectacle of myself. My choices appear to be anonymity or comfort - tomorrow will tell.

A Retraction of Yesterday

I feel like I need to apologize for the mood of my last post. I guess I am still getting over the last year of school- hands down one of my worst. Both my girls called to "tease" me about sounding so in-your-face; I really was just venting. Sometimes things just add up and explode. Those of you who know me know that I'm not usually like that. So, if I came across as moody or angry, I apologize.

Tomorrow we head to the great city of Houston. I say that tongue in cheek, because except for my family there, I'd never go back. They are the only draw for me, and so I'm trying to develope a better attitude about the city as a whole. Hmmm, another new attitude... is this a pattern?
Anyway, we will be there for the quick weekend, and then back home. Week one of summer will be over.

Enjoy your Friday!

What, a post without the Spurs in it???!!

Greetings after a week away; I'm back to writing on my home computer which is tentative at best, so posts will depend on its "mood." I'll do my best, but be patient....

People who are not involved in teaching just don't get it. I'm about ready to just give up trying to explain that the end of the year is traumatic. I guess the closest I would come would be if you quit your job and had to pack up everything in boxes and walk away after completing 6 surveys, checking everything off 5 lists, turning in everything you've checked out from 10 different people, and then walking away from the kids you've given your heart and soul to for 9 months, wondering like crazy if you've made any difference in their life. I'm really trying not to whine - I don't like whiners - but why does everyone I talk to think I need to "do something" immediately after school is over?!?! My in-laws, neighbors, and even dear friends are probably tired of looking at my glazed-over eyes whenever they ask me what I'm going to "do", but until my brain is rested and quiet, I have no plans. None. The first couple of weeks, I'm on coast. Rest. Vegge. The old Amy will arise again in time, but until then, know that I am doing what I need mentally to adjust to the end of a long, stressful year.

Now, that rant's over.

Had a wonderful visit with my dearest friend, Shanon. She came over and we talked, and talked, and talked. Played a new game so she could beat Andy, and took a nice nap one afternoon. Other than that, we talked.... I love her with my whole heart, and when I am with her, I realize how much I wish she was in my life more often. She's seen the best and worst in me, and has seen me grow into a better woman through the years. I've seen her at depths of sorrow and anger that no one should have to face, and she has come out of it with her faith in the Lord to sustain her. We strive very hard to hold on to a friendship that could easily be given up on considering the miles between us, but we won't let it. I am so grateful for that.
She calls me her "forever friend" and I am honored. I feel the same.

Thanks for coming, dear friend. I miss you already -

Eulogy for Manu

Spurs lose to Lakers; Manu just wasn't a factor at all; nor Tony for that matter. At least it wasn't a blow-out; just not to be. I think the every-other year thing is in their heads, and we have to fix that.

If I hear Kobe one more time, though, I may go Postal.

Now what do I post about ?!?

Closing up the year today with a lot of nothing to do. One good thing about teaching what I do is, I get a couple of days the homeroom teachers don't get, so I get ahead of the game. Now, it's wait to sign out and load the car.

Plans, plans, and more plans

I am married to a planner. Shoulda seen it coming before the wedding, but even then, I had no idea the ramifications it would hold. 32 years of planning...
I've come to realize that it is not a bad thing, in case you were wondering. Sure, for a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants girl, who loves to jump up and run, it can have it's frustrations, but for the most part, it is a more sane lifestyle. It breeds consistency and calm routine. And sometime, boredom.
Take children. I wanted a baby right away. Married - baby - house. Not Andrew. He wanted to wait 4 years (we were all of 21 at the time!! That clock of mine was ticking loudly!!) before having our first, and I just gave up trying to talk him into it. The man does nothing he doesn't want to. So, we had Dana after 4 years. It's not just the big things either, and sometimes those are the most frustrating.

Now, I understand that living with a jump and run wife is not easy. "Where's dinner," he asks. "Oh, I decided to color with Erin this afternoon instead of cook, so, we'll have it in a couple of hours." "Did you pick up _____ ?" " Oops, Cathy called and we went to see Dee." You get his side of this story? I really think it may be harder for him, because it sets his whole way of thinking way off kilter; whereas, I have no kilter to set off.

What's the point of this entry? I'm thinking about how this is just one part of married life that makes things hard - if you don't balance it. Luckily, over the years, we've adapted to each other, and have learned how to keep the other one from total domination. I've learned to wait, be patient, accept "not now" without pouting. He's learned to throw in some spontaneity every now and then to pacify the wife. It's a win-win. Finally, we've figured something out!!

Spurs vs school ending...

I know that I'm vascillating between the two subjects listed above, but other than my upcoming venture into grandmother-hood, nothing else right now occupies my mind. The way the Spurs are going, it should come to a crashing end soon; much to my sadness. I think they've believed all the hype about their age and not being able to repeat, and so it will lead to an early demise. So sad....

I'm looking forward to an easy summer with my dear Andrew and sweet daughters, and finishing some plans we are starting on the house, so I'm pumped. I just hope it doesn't go too fast!

Time for the fun to begin - have a good day!

The last Friday with children !!

Today is my last day to "serve" children. Next week is only 2 1/2 days full of awards, movies, parties, and other end-of-year mania. It all comes down to how to keep them busy when they know grades are in and it's over. Especially the 4th graders going to a new campus - it's a done deal. Anyway, back to my kids.

My little man Pate (no pun to the movie title intended!) will not be here today. He lingered back after the others left yesterday, as is his method when he wants to tell me something, and told me the family is leaving for a long weekend at lunch. I tried not to fuss too much, and he gave a little side hug and grin, and we promised to see each other before the end of next week. Today is celebration day for all they've done in class, and I've brought soda and popcorn. Not enough to get them hyper, you understand, but enough to enjoy. We will talk, play dominoes or some other game, and then say goodbye. It's been a long year, and I'm ready.

I have to tell you that knowing I have 3 years left is an odd sensation as far as approaching work next year. The end being in sight, even though it is 3 years and not the last, helps put things into perspective. I don't like what school is becoming, at least on this campus, but I can continue to influence my corner of the world the best I can and keep things balanced and sane. Then, Lord willing, I will walk out the door knowing I gave it my best.

Well, let's get this Friday going - the popcorn is ready to be popped and the drinks are cold!! Let's party!!

To Newlyweds everywhere -

On Saturday, Andy and I drove to Houston to attend the 25th wedding anniversary party for his sister and her husband. As I was paying for our drinks at the Shell station, I mentioned our trip to the clerk, and she said, "Wow - have her tell me how they did it." I told her - they are friends and laugh all the time. They have a commitment to each other for life.

So, as I spend the day in reflection of my 32 years with Andrew, I think about all those who are newly married and wondering how it's going to work. Lots of things come into play, but here are the basics I think every marriage must have to work:
~ God has to be first. Without His Word to guide us and the example of other Christian couples, it can be trecherous out there.
~ Commit to each other for life. That phrase "Till death do us part" is not there for its literary beauty. There will be no divorce. It is not an option.
~ Laugh - often and from the gut
~ Kiss a lot (my favorite !)
~ Take aging and difficulty as they come. You are both getting older, and hard times will come, so hold on and get through them.
~ Keep no secrets.

Most of these have been relatively easy for us, but a couple have not, and it's usually been because of something stupid I've done. But because Andrew is Andrew, we've made it this far.

He says tonight is a surprise, so I'm eager to get home. No Spurs, so I guess we'll be alone!! I plan on a lot of kissing!!

That time of year....

I'm sitting here, looking at my classroom, and thinking of the stuff I really need to get busy doing. My "nest" around my desk is scary with it's sticky notes, schedules, ARD schedules, calendars, - well, you get the idea. I was hoping that I'd be packing it up for good, but the retirement thing isn't working out. I didn't really think it would, but had a little hope. So, I'm staying in this room another year. I'll be on this campus half a day and Primary the other half. I guess I will choose to make the best of it, but I'd much rather do something else... any ideas?

We had a lovely visit with the family this past weekend. Since we see the nieces and nephews so seldom, it was eye-opening to see the men and women they'd become since we were last there. Soon, they will all be one their own, and it will just be the "old folks" sitting around. I hope I can still find my way over there!!

I''m doing it TODAY !

I've been thinking about it for a while, now, and Mary Beth has really encouraged me to go for it. Now, even Andrew is giving me signs that he will support me. I thought it was years away, but apparently not.

I'm looking into retirement. Wow. It's probably way too soon for us to manage financially, but the events of this past year and the way next year is looking, I'm thinking the time may be "righter" than I thought. I have only a week or two at the most to make my decision, so pray, pray, pray, please!! I'm afraid and anxious all at once, so I'm hoping it's very obvious what I need to do.

I just DON'T want another year like this one... ever.

I'll keep you posted!!

Something new to think about....

Do you ever feel like God is thumping you on the head, saying "Hello!! Look at it from this angle!! I'm right here!! ?"

When the girls were born, I gave them back to God. I promised Him that I would raise them in faith and truth, that I would show His love to them at every opportunity, and all I would ask would be that He kept them safe and well. So far, so good.

Now, though, I realize that perhaps one of my prayers for a long while has been limited to what I perceived asthe only way that God could work. How naive of me to put God's abilities in such a small box. Now, I'll sit back and see just how amazing His love for my child can be. I'll continue trusting and watching for the long-awaited outcome to my prayers.

Good to have them back!!

I'm not sure who those guys were in New Orleans, but they in no way resembled the team that took game 3 last night. Tim, Tony and Many were back in their element, and it was way beyond fun to watch! Gregg and Erin came in about half-way through the 3rd period and enjoyed watching the group cheer the boys on. Once we got through that one, we felt like the game was ours. Sunday night is not so dreaded now, and then we go back to N.O.

I just hope the Big Three make the team plane!!

Thanks to my daughters!

Every now and then, a memory rushes over me like a tidal wave, and I am a little girl once again. Just now, as I sat at my desk, I saw a class of very excited 4th graders coming into their room with their Mother's Day cards created in computer lab. Each face so proud, so full of excitement at the anticipation of giving it to their mom and seeing her reaction. Later today, if you brought money, you get to go to the cafeteria and decorate a cake for Mom and take it home to her. It's the talk of the campus!

For me, Mother's Day was always the hardest. Margaret was creative and talented and had high standards. I'm not saying she didn't love my little homemade cards and stuff; it was later when we were both adults that the pressure to please her was the worst.
And the cards full of sappy sentiment just didn't say what I felt.
We just didn't have that type of relationship, as much as I wanted it. By the time she was able to say what I needed to hear, it was too late. My heart was hard and unlistening.

So, for me, it's all about my girls. What joy they have given me in their lives, and I have learned so much about myself through them. Their love and respect fill my life with pleasure, and Mother's Day comes with each phone call I receive. Who needs cake?!

A moment of reflection

Today, we met with our principal in team meetings. Usually, it's pretty serious stuff, but today began the marking off of days! When all was said and done, I have 8 - count 'em -days of classes with my kids. Single digits!! There's Field Day, field trips, movies, awards ceremonies, and touring the PIC campus; their new home in the Fall.
When the kids came in, I went over all the good stuff and told them just how few days we have left together. I've had them for 2 years now, and the already anxious feelings they have about PIC are compounded (by a few at least) with sadness of leaving me. Some, I'm ready to part with and pass on, but there are some in this group I'll try hard to keep in touch with: Jimmy the cartoon voice boy, Zoe my little "tweener", Max - a big boy a year older that I can love one minute and pinch the next, and Pate. Such a quiet little man I'll miss the most.
But there's the beauty of teaching; another group comes in right behind them in the Fall, and our lives will intermingle as these have. My little ones will move on and do just fine. I just hope I made some measure of impact in their lives.

What a weekend!!

Yesterday, I crashed. I reached my stopping point about 2:30 p.m. after a whirlwind couple of days. Between the Spurs, Dana coming in, and the luncheon, it was crazy. Add to that, Andy leaving early for Georgetown on Sat. morning, it was madness and mayhem. But I am filled with happy feelings this morning, full of good memories and anticipation of more to come.

Having Dana at home is always wonderful. I'd keep her forever, but I know that is not the way it will be... so I relish my time with her. Just having her at the luncheon was a treat, even though we really didn't spend it together. Then, she chose to go out on Sat. night rather than watch the Spurs with us!! What is up with that?!? Anyway...

The comments on the luncheon far surpassed my expectation, but then the efforts put out by everyone to transform the room certainly set the stage. We've learned a few things for next time, but for the most part, it was perfect. The team worked beautifully together, and the turn out was great!!

Yesterday was Andy's biggest day. Church, blood drive, elders' meeting, put up tables and set up fellowship room as usual (ugly!), worship, grocery story then home. I missed him, but he just has those days.

Now, we have the week to rest. Thursday, Gregg, Erin and Roarke come in for a long weekend. The Spurs crowd will be at our house when they arrive, so that will be fun. Everyone loves the Johnsons, and will be so happy to see them. Hopefully, the Spurs will oblige!!

Well, school begins - have a good day!

A simple sentence leads to a glorious event!!

Tomorrow is the luncheon. We've had a great time planning it, and everyone is good to go; or so I hope. Lots of emails, phone calls, planning meetings, and so on come down to tomorrow at 11:00. I hoped and prayed for 40 ladies to sign up; we have just over 50!! I am so pumped - I feel like this is a jumping off point for more good things to come.

After school, we meet to pull the tables all together, to put our heads together once more, and to see just what it is we've forgotten. I can't imagine how it will all play out, but I know it's been a labor of love. God will be glorified and His daughters will have a great time together. His Will be done.

I'll let you know all about it later!!

I would wager that, no matter on which campus you chose to visit, today you would see teachers, counselors, administrators and students walking about in a daze. Bags under the eyes, faces that look like they've not slept in a week, which is a falacy because every adult I work with has gone home after testing and fallen into bed to sleep off the day's stress. (Do you know that if I am found to have "cheated" in any way, my teaching liscense will be revoked? No matter how tiny the infraction, you are called in and written up, so yes - there is mental stress here!) Yesterday, I tested 7 children who finished their day's work at 11:00. We sat in silence, except for a 30 minute lunch, until 2:30. Can you do that? No drawing, no writing, no getting up. Sitting and reading or sleeping. I myself cannot do that, much less a 10 year old.

Anyway... it's over for another year. What is done is done. Everyone now is looking to the "fun" part of school - Field Trips and field days, and the creative side of teaching that is pushed aside for the sake of "THE TEST."

I just hope I passed !!

WOW

Everyone is saying it. This series with Phoenix was tough enough to be the Finals; I truly had my doubts last night.
After a hard day of testing, I wasn't going to go; just send Andy to the Hendersons without me and go to bed. I was drained, and yet knew I'd really regret it if I didn't go and they won. So, I went, sat down, and mainly listened to the game. Didn't visit, didn't wander back and forth between tv and snacks. Just sat and hoped against hope the old boys had one more win in their bag of tricks.

They did. Why do I doubt - well, there was that game last Sunday!! Anyway, it wasn't pretty or even athletic in some parts, just hack-a- Shaq'n and floppin and whistle blowing. When it was all said and done, the Spurs were on top to move on. Shaq even kept his mouth shut and didn't say a word on his way out. He knew he'd been schooled.

Now it's on the the Hornets. Younger, hungry, naive about the playoffs and all they bring to the court. Can the boys do it? I know a group of about 20 who will be there every tip off, just to see. We have faith in our boys and Pop.

TAKS begins

It starts this morning; three days of testing what the state says the kids need to know....

Tonight is the Spurs next chance to eliminate the Suns, and I have to go to bed because of testing... I would be too tired if I stayed up for the whole game, so I'll leave it with Andrew and hope I wake up to good news.

If you see a teacher this week, please be nice. It's very stressful around school right now.s

Meet the NBA's Jekyl and Hyde!

Okay, we all go home Friday and take a nap so we can stay awake for the mid-nightish game before us. We put on our Spurs regailia and gather our snacks and find our spots for the night's viewing; high on anticipation.

We were not let down - it was amazing from tip-off to final buzzer!! The Spurs of old (last June!) were in the building and they had their way with those Suns!! It was glorious, and staying awake was a breeze.

So, where were those guys yesterday?!? Could it be they were as tired from Friday as I was ?! It's like two different teams came to play, and it was nothing if not a fan's worst nightmare. Oh well, I'd rather they melt down now rather than in a more crucial situation. I know they will take the series, I was just spoiled on Friday.

Now, on to Tuesday night at the AT&T !!

Changing Perspective

I love Jackie Hutton. Since she came into my life way back in the 20th century, my life has been so much more fun. She makes me laugh when no one else can, and is very adept at reading me. She is a blessing in every way and I thank God for her.

Tuesday night, she fussed at me, and I am taking what she said to heart. I am hooking up my answering machine tonight.

Years ago, we had an answering machine. We unplugged it and destroyed it because the only messages we ever got were either creditors wanting payments we didn't have, or my mother calling to complain or demand. It was not something we ever wanted to listen to again, so why have one of the instruments of torture?!

So. Last Christmas, we are celebrating with the Huttons and exchange gifts. With lots of love, we are presented with a brand new answering machine!! And as I write this post, it is still sitting in the box beside my couch. Everyday, I look at it, and know I need to hook it up, but the past invades my good intentions.

Not today. I have had a revelation, and when I get home, I am hooking it up. I've realized that the demons of the past are gone, and that now it is a messenger of love and good tidings from family and friends. It will be a connection once again to the people I love.

So. Please call and leave words of encouragement. I may falter....

Thanks, Erin !

As soon as I heard that Erin was pregnant, I told her that I wanted one of those little time-line counters for my blog page. She and I discussed the parameters of it all yesterday, and so here it is!! I didn't know there were so many factors; colors, style, etc. I just want to see it!! Anyway, it's just another example of how pregnancy has changed since she was born; I had no idea of when the event took place or when she would arrive with such specificity!! "September" was about as close as I knew. Now, it's a science all its own.

But the result is the same; your life is never the same . Get ready, Erin and Gregg - life is about to take you on one grand adventure!

Watching people run ....

I don't think of myself as a very creative person when it comes to most anything, but I have discovered that I can come up with ideas that people respond to. Then, I find the talented folks around me that I know would be wonderful at the task, and get them going. I listen to their ideas and watch the brains twirl in excitement as the ideas grow and grow. I leave them to their wonderful works and then do what I can to help. The end result is something wonderful for all that I didn't mess up by trying to pull it off all by myself.

Right now, I'm watching a wonderful group of women who I love work on a luncheon for the Ladies of the church. It's a diverse group who probably wouldn't seek each other out, but are finding all sorts of things they have in common in the process of putting this together. Actually, that was the whole idea to begin with; to bring together a group that is new and refreshing and eager to "find a spot." So far, it appears to be working!!

Everyone working together for the glory of God. What better task?!

And the lamp goes flying!!

Anyone who knows my husband would agree that he is a man of self-control. He always tempers his reactions to things by taking it in and then showing what he thinks in a calm, thought-out way.

Not Saturday. Not when Timmy hit the 3 pointer that lead to the Spurs first victory over the Suns in double over-time. When it did "nothing but net," Andy threw up his arms and knocked the floor lamp off kilter, almost hitting my dad's christening gown to the floor! He caught it just in time, and then we continued to celebrate his good aim in fun and frivoloty. Could we have enjoyed it any more - I don't think so.

Game two - Tomorrow!! Go, SPURS, GO !!

Sounds in the night

How is it that things that are so quiet by day are magnified at night? The grandfather clock that I hardly notice every 15 minutes sounds like Big Ben, and the refridgerator's hum could hypnotize anyone!

Last night, about 1:30, I woke up to the sound of rain coming down hard on my roof. Now, we've had a drought for a while now, and any rain is welcome, but this was really coming down!! Lightning lit my bedroom and the thunder shook the windows. I really wanted to sit in the dark living room and just take it in, except for the fact that I had to go work today. The one time I wished for insomnia, it failed me and I went right back to sleep.
But it was great while it lasted!!

Sleepy, but vindicated

I go to bed at night at about 10:15. I need lots of sleep, and I always feel it's not fair to the students if I'm grumpy because I stayed up too late.

Well, I'm grumpy... I stayed up till the SPURS game was over, and it was a beauty!! I love it when they fire on all cylinders, and last night they had it going! I guess having Manu and Brent back, and the pressure of the playoffs looming kicked them into gear, because my SPURS of old were back!!

So, if you call or see me today, and I'm droopy and grumpy (or any of the other dwarfs !!), just look deeper - I'm truly excited!!

So, Go, SPURS, Go !!

Ahhhhh, Spring!

Coming to school this morning, I'm reminded that, before there was air-conditioning, teachers were able to open their windows wide and let the cool breezes of an early Spring morning come into the classroom. The temperatures will warm up by lunch duty, but for now, it is wonderful.

I really wish I was at home....

A whole season comes down to this!!

I started off as a "social fan" - just joining in with the crowd; peer pressure and all that. Now, I'm a full-blown addict; I need an Intervention. I'm about to go into the NBA playoffs, and I'm afraid my SPURS are going to make me go cold-turkey. It's not a sure thing like last year; I don't "feel it."

The nuns have already prayed, so I guess it's my turn.

Go, SPURS, Go !!

One of those days

My life is pretty simple. Go to school, come home, rest and eat and watch a little tv, then it begins again. I wish I had a hobby that filled my time, but as a soon-to-be grandmother, I think that is coming.

But today is one of those days that is filled up with things I need to do: fill the hummingbird feeders (they're back!!), fertilize the plants, support Andrew on his yearly torture of doing taxes, and laundry.

We did start off with a nice breakfast, though. My dear cousin Elaine and her hubby of 45 years, Royce, are in town for the Strawberry Festival. Now, Royce is not the biggest talker, but he held his own, and we ate good pancakes and sausage. They are going to go over to the festival for a bit and head back home.
It was a nice visit; she brought current pictures, and we got caught up on everyone's lives. Our mom's were sisters, and as we sat there, I somehow felt like we've taken their spots in the family - and it felt good. We only see each other once or so a year, but it's comfortable and sweet. I'm truly glad they came.

Times like this

In life, there are times when it is impossible to express the feelings rolling around inside one's heart and mind. I've had a few; the death of my father, driving away from Shanon in Huntsville, holding Dana and Erin for the first time. Then, watching them be baptized by their dad. Watching Erin in her wedding gown float like an angel so serene and in love. Seeing my husband accept the eldership for our church family, and burying Smudge. Some make us so happy we feel Heaven will be almost pale in comparison, and some make us wish the very earth would open up and swallow us to take away the agony.

Now, we add another joy to the list; my Erin and her Gregg are having a baby. Lots of women have babies, I hear, but this one - well, it's special. It's my grandchild, and I am entering a new realm of life, along with my Andrew. My breath is taken away from me at the dreams of it all.

I cannot WAIT until tomorrow!!

What's for dinner ?!?!

About the time I got into high school, my mom started saying, "I'm tired of cooking!!" I didn't think much about it during the time, because I was a kid, and moms were supposed to cook for the family. No quitting; it was a job to the death.

Now, we weren't a big eating-out family. My dad got home early (4:30 pm), and he expected the dinner on the table when he arrived. Our kitchen wasn't air-conditioned, and so mom cooked early in the afternoon before it got too hot. She kept it warm for him, he came home and loved every bite. "Muy bueno comida!!" he would say in his most appreciative tone, and go on out to work on some car or mow. We didn't eat together as a family, and usually we ate in front of the tv. It was always good.

Back to cooking... well, I marry Andy, who also came from a non-eating-out family, and so the tradition of cooking continued. The girls came along, we were broke, or felt like it, and so eating out was a luxury. Maybe on report card day, or some such excitement. Years passed. I cooked.

Now, the girls are gone, and I sound a lot like my mother on those days in the hot kitchen. I am tired of cooking. And you know, it's not even the task of the job, but the planning and deciding of it. Tell me what to fix, and I'll do it, but please don't make me decide. Let's get something we both like and forget the grocery store - HEB has gotten enough of our cash!!

The end has come

After 6 weeks of dvds, we finished the "Marriage Enrichment" class at church. It was the big one - the sex dvd, and the facilitator was most uncomfortable. Some of our parents had their teenage children in on the viewing, and that was a factor, I'm sure. Anyway, it was good to refresh our minds through out the sessions on how wonderful marriage can be if you both focus on each other. I admit; this past year, I've been pretty focused on myself with the surgeries and stuff, and Andrew has really been keeping things going. It's not been our best year, but at least we made it through together.

So, Andrew, Thanks. Just in case I don't say it to you enough, you make my life a joy.

Even when you order coins....

3 week trial

During the Spring, between Spring Break and TAKS, we have this little exercise called "Project Based Specials." The kids who do well on their benchmarks get to choose a fun activity (computer games, sewing, Talent show, etc.) and the kids who are still "at risk" stay with their teacher and get intervention help. Since my
kids are in one group or another, my schedule falls apart and I get a whole new one. For the most part, it stays the same, but for half the day I'm in a new place at a new time. So....

for now, if I look dazed and confused - I most likely am. Come on, April 18th!!

April, then May....

It's not just me... people all around me (who just happen to also work at school!) are already doing the count down. "Two months!" "9 weeks, 1 day" "only 9 more Mondays!" Now, having the year I've had, I thought I was especially early on the count down, but oh, no!

It's not that we don't like our jobs - school is a great place to be - but I think as the stress grows more and more daunting, we look for Summer as our only positive. It is a taste of the life we would really prefer having year-round. School used to be lots of fun and we even mourned that day when the bell rang and the kids walked away for the last time. Now, we race them to our cars.

So, here's my take - 43 days to go!

It's that same ol' feeling

Do you ever FEEL a place? This morning, as I drove to school, I "felt" Tulsa, Okla.
It's the weekend of the Soul Winning Workshop, and as sure as I was up there, I felt the air, the anticipation of getting to the Fairgrounds, the excitement of seeing Christians from all over the US gathered for 4 wonderful days, and of course, the singing. Thousands of voices in glorious harmonies, filling the Pavillion and rocking the place at the same time.

I have such wonderful memories of the Workshop - and though the last time I went without Andy I said I'd never go without him again, I'd be there right now given the chance. Drat not having personal days to take off!! Being there is a place that bonds you with the people you go with, the Pursches, Huttons, Bryans, Mainords, Ray, and of course, Andy and my girls. A little preview of Heaven....

So, they'll go on without me this year, but my heart will be there - and it FEELS wonderful!

moving

Gotcha - not us!!

I have twins that I work with that came at the beginning of the year. Really irritating, obnoxious little 4th grade girls who know how to push every button on me and all the kids around them. They are always amazed at how the other kids treat them, and I try really hard to not permit their cruelty, but IF YOU KNEW these girls, you'd "turn the other cheek." Anyway, about a month ago, they announced they were moving to a new home and changing schools to a nearby district. Needless to say, the kids have been counting the days. I will say, I was struck when the more likable of the two said, "I've learned a lot here, and I'm going to do better in --------. It's a new start for me." Unfortunately, her sister hasn't caught on. Well, after Spring Break, they're still here, and it was hard to mask the look of disappointment on the kids' faces. They both assure us that Friday is their last day.

Now, today, my buddy Jimmy (the boy with the cartoon voice) tells me HE'S moving to San Antonio. His mom's "friend" is ready for them to come up there, and even though she'd told him they'd wait until school was out, she plans to go the end of the month.

How differently I feel about these two situations !! I'd be losing them to the Intermediate campus next year anyway, so my time was limited, but this is sad to me in that I won't see him at Wal-Mart or HEB - and it makes me think about people coming and going out of our lives all the time. There are some folks I'd never get over losing in my daily life, and others that are just a blimp on my screen.
Like the twins - I hope they find a new start, with people who will love them like I love Jimmy. They deserve it.

The older I get...

A student told me today that they moved to Pleasanton because his dad was getting too old and not doing his job well (sound familiar?!?), and without a pause, he adds, "Like he's 49 or so, maybe 51." Now, you can imagine my reaction - unless he's a San Antonio Spur or a professional ice skater, I'm thinking this is NOT that old. I didn't tell him my age.

Speaking of my Spurs, I've been pretty worried about their play-off standings. Those are some of the most fun nights I have, with my buddies and me and all cheese dips and chips we can eat. Sure, I want them to repeat for a back-to-back, so I'm holding my breath and being optimistic.

It was a good day today.

The end is in sight!

Next to my computer, I have a calendar. I love to look at calendars, especially when something cool is on the horizon and I can count down the days. I used to especially love March calendars, for they held promise of Spring Break and trips to Tulsa Workshop. This year, Spring Break stands alone, and I am resigned to that.

However, when I looked at the calendar, I saw something new to look forward to - 9 weeks of school. 9 - single digits until this most difficult of years is over. I always look forward to the end, but after this year, I am even more so. This year has had such difficulty embedded in it that on some days, I can scarely breath. It has been, other than my year at Jr. Hi, just about the worst.

But I can do 9 weeks. I can - and will - continue to go and do what I love most about my job; give my kids all I have. We both deserve to finish this year with my best. I hope you'll pray that it's a quick and painless time.

Spring Break Monday

Spring Break Monday. Home alone, quiet house, working on the computer. Some of my coworkers are at the beach, some skiing, some elsewhere visiting family and doing cool things.
I want to be home, today, "catching up" with rest, shows I've taped, and emails I've not written. Later in the week, Andy will be off, and we will go somewhere just the two of us. I need it - some of that romance Darla mentioned last week.

Till then, I'll be thinking of my two girls - each dealing with events in their lives that I've gone through and know things will work out just fine. Moms just have to sit by sometime and listen and love from a distance. They know I'm here.

YES !!

The bell has rung, the children are gone- Spring Break is here! Dana is coming home for a few of the days, so that will be nice, but I'm looking forward to Monday - I'll be home alone with movies and whatever I want to have for lunch. Most of the week will be quiet, which is what most of my co-workers are planning too.

I'm not saying I wish we were going somewhere, but things didn't work out that way. I'm thinking BIG road trip this summer, though. (Andy isn't even in on my ideas just yet :) !!!)

For those of you who are also teachers, enjoy your days off !! April and May are still to come!!!!

Secrets

Had a great visit in Houston with the kids; wish I could go stay some over Spring Break, but Erin and Gregg both work, and Dana will be coming home, so I'll just have to wait till Summer... (hint, hint!)

The last week or two, secrets have become a big part of my life. It's like the good and bad of humanity has landed in my head, and asked me not to talk about it. As an elder's wife, we are priviledged to counsel people when they are down, and I feel Andy and I are a good team at that, but it's hard to learn things and not let them effect you. You have to take what is given, help the person process it and reach closure, and then drop it without dwelling on what they have shared. It's tough. Being uninvolved is much better on the heart, sometimes.

And then, there are good secrets - ones that will come to light in all good time. Ones that restore a little of that lost faith in people.

Have a good evening!

News from HOUSTON

Greetings from Houston - Erin and Gregg did good on the house! Lots of neat touches and they're already busy making it their own.... Roarke has lots of room to run and play, and two empty someday grandkid rooms, just waiting. Right now, we are using one of them, and look forward to lots more visits.
Andy loves the backyard; you can probably handle it with a weed-eater. Very pretty landscaping and cozy feel. Tonight we are going to take Andy to Carabbas - the original - and stuff him full of Italian food.
The weather is lovely, and my kids are here with me; overall, a nice day in Houston!

Poor, dumb trees !

Well, it never fails. A few weeks ago, I noticed the ash trees on campus budding out. It was still February, for goodness sake!! Well, today, winter is back with a vengeance, and the ash trees are shivering in their trunks!! This crazy Texas weather!!

I hope you are warm and cozy where you are!!

From the mouth of 4th graders

Today was the TAKS writing test for 4th graders. My assignment was a group of 6 mainly dyslexic students and kids that would "disrupt" the regular class. It makes for a long, long day, and I'll be heating left-overs for Andy.

To show the mood, here's a quote from one of my boys. "Mrs. LaMore, I really hope we get a new governor, so we can quit taking these tests!!"

Oh, Taylor. If it were just that simple.

Notes of Encouragement

I love to encourage people. It takes so little time and effort, yet the rewards are instantaeous and true.

Yesterday, I wrote one of my dyslexia student's mom to tell her how very much I enjoyed her son's manners. In the days of teaching, 2008, you hear a lot of "Huhs?" and "Yeahs" and "Idunnknows". This little fella is almost - well, I guess he is if I took the time to write his mom - out of the ordinary with this politeness. And it doesn't make him wierd! I guess that it truly what makes him stand out; he is an active, goofy little boy who could handle his own in any social situation.

I wrote his mom because she is actually his "step" - not a rarity in any school, and she's only been in his life about 3 years. I told her to feel good, that all the work she's pouring into this little man is paying off even when she's not around. In no time, I had an email back, so happy was she to hear from me.

That made my day - a happy mom made so by 5 minutes of my time. What better thing could I have done with that 5 minutes?

Thoughts on Lent, Fasting, and Sacrifice

There's been a lot of talk around me lately from people who've chosen things to "give up" during this Lenten season, and I've been doing quite a bit of introspection into my own life. My own choices and decisions. My own sacrifice.
What I've come to realize is that I'm not in the mood to deny myself. I've hit a spot in the road that is not willing to put something I love aside even in the desire to draw closer to God.
Right now, I'm just about dealing with myself and my daily walk. Sounds kinda depressing to me, now that I see it, but maybe it will pass soon.
I'm proud of all of you who are disciplining yourselves - you are my role-models. Keep it up and grow stronger. I'll catch up with you later.

Farewell, Scary Bear !

My mom went through a phase with QVC where she bought porceline dolls that looked like family members and mechanical "robot" animals. We had the gray furry cat with a Santa hat, a little girl with arms that waved to "decorate" the Christmas tree, a tall Easter bunny wearing a straw hat and SCARY BEAR !

A few weeks ago, my family had a garage sale, and out came the robots. The gray cat's head was deformed and the little girl had mold on her face. The Easter Bunny no longer moved, but went for $5 because he still looked cute. Scary Bear went, too. Before we could get a picture of the girls with him for posterity's sake, he was gone. He was a tall brown bear wearing a red striped nightgown and holding a candle to see with. He usually stood by the grandfather clock in the living room, his arms making a scraping noise as they moved back and forth. I never knew how the girls hated him, although they loved to torment their cousin Casey with him each year. Once they 'fessed up about being afraid of him, of course Andy took great pleasure in leaving him in new places to catch them off guard. I never did figure out what made him so scary to two little girls. Now, he is gone.

Just goes to show you that you never know how things will affect a kid until they grow up and tell you!

A Goose-Bump moment

I think I'm mentioned Naythan before. Wish I could post his little face for you to see; blond, babyish, missing all those teeth.
The students have been issued id tags made of hard plastic, and he's chewed or broken up his second one since Christmas.

He comes to me for 50 min. daily with two other boys for dyslexia services. They read circles around him, and when I first met him in August, he was not able to sound out three letter words. Led, dog, you get the idea - it was torture. Going to the library went like this: "Naythan, are those your books?" as he stand there with Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings or some other nonsense. "Yes ma'am, I'm not going to read them anyways, so I may as well look like I can." Reading was just not something he ever thought he's do... and I was just about convinced myself.
Well, we got him tested for more services - he qualified as LD and Speech. His mom and I sent tag phone messages, and notes in the planner with things for them to work on, and lo and behold, yesterday happens.

We go to the library. Naythan and his buddies split off from me, and begin looking. I wait. Eventually, Naythan comes and sits by me with Green Eggs and Ham. He opens it and begins to read to me. Sentences. Multi-word sentences. Not every word is perfect, but I'll take it. My eyes begin to water - those pesky allergies - and Naythan looks at me for assurance. I wanted to grab that little kid and kiss his face all over. Naythan read....

I've never liked Dr. Seuss and his convoluted stories with made up words, but that book read by Naythan was the sweetest book I've heard in a long, long time.

Two out of three??

On Thursday, I will go to Lola Fae's funeral; the second one in two weeks. Mom always said death comes in threes - I hope not in this case! I feel a real responsibility to attend these ceremonies - to honor the lives of those who have been a big part of mine. Not that I was that close to Lola Fae or Karo, it's just that we have a commonality of faith and a hope of the resurrection to come, and they led the way ahead for me.
I always wonder at funerals who will come to mine; what will people remember about me or say in my memory. Whatever it will be, I hope it's not for quite a while.

Karo and Becky

Some couples just have "it." Their love is visible and real to all who know them, and you can almost smell the connection between them. Andy and I have commented through the years about couples we knew that had "it," and some who you just couldn't figure out how they got together to begin with.
Karo and Becky had "it." You couldn't imagine one without the other, and their names had grown into one over the years.
At Karo's funeral on Wed., Ray said they'd been married 62 years. Together a lot longer than some people live. And now, Becky is alone. You know they talked about the day one of them would die and leave the other, and now it is here.
62 + years of hand holding, kissing goodnight, riding in the car together, eating dinner at the same table. At his visitation the night before his funeral, she sat beside him, just as I'd seen her do on countless occasions, and wondered how being alone will feel. I can't imagine....
62 years. Half of what I have had with Andrew. I feel like a bride!

Looking back and smiling

My firstborn turned 28 today - Happy Birthday, Dana Elizabeth! My labor was very long, and by the time she was born, the sun and risen and set again. Too much demeral almost took her from us, but we didn't know that until later; don't think about that much, but when I do, it shakes me to my core. She wonders why I say, "be careful" all the time, but I guess in the back of my mind, I'm remembering that.

She got to be the guinea pig, and there's really very little I think I messed up. I had so much fun playing with her and watching her learn and grow. I stretched one year at home with her and Erin into two, and almost bankrupted us with not teaching, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat to be with them every day.

I don't doubt that all moms think their daughter is the best, but I understand it more every day. To see what God does with a life given to Him is amazing, and while I miss the little girl Dana, I relish my time with the woman she is. Who knows what the future holds, right?!?

Truly empty nesters now

It began in Aug. of 1999, when Dana left for Lubbock. The empty nesting was upon us, as well as the adjusting to goes with it. Then, Erin left in 2001, and while our children were gone, there was still the responsibility of our cats, Smudge and Cinder.
We lost Smudge during December a couple of years ago, and now yesterday, Cinder died. She went into renal failure and the vet gave her at most a couple of weeks. So, we did the humane thing and put her to sleep. The vet assured us that we can get another good cat from them as soon as we are ready, but I think we'll pass.
She was a good kitty and did a fine job of keeping moles out of the yard. I'll miss her, probably not as much as Andy, but we'll be pet-loose and fancy-free for the time being.
Maybe we'll wait for grandchildren !!

Rest in Peace, Jennifer

In the Spring of 1990, I was teaching an MR class at the Elementary. There were enough students for two classes that year, and the other teacher had been there since Adam. As school was drawing to a close, I was informed that since the majority of the two classes were moving on to Jr. Hi, my position was no longer necessary, and I would be going on with them. That year was eternal, high-lighted by the death of my dad. (In Feb. of that year, Andy told me I could flip hamburgers in the Fall rather than go back to Jr. Hi. Another story for another day.)
Each day of that year, I walked myself to my classroom chanting, "May will come, May will come." The day was spent working with emotionally disturbed 8th graders who disliked me only marginally more than I them, and I felt my life a waste of time, at least professionally.
Except for Jennifer. I read today that she is dead at the age of 30. I wept.
For one period a day that year, 3 students made me smile.
Trey - a long, skinny, talented boy, Amy - a poised, warm, knowing young lady I still see around town, and Jennifer. She was funny and bright, and kept me from killing a kid or two. I lost track to her until just a few years ago, when I came upon her on campus, picking up her son. She looked just like she did all those years ago, and smiled and hugged me tight. Over the next couple of years, we'd see each other and visit a minute, and it was so wonderful to see how things had turned out for her. And now, she is dead. It takes the air out of my lungs to
type it. How - do I even want to know? I almost hope it was a disease or accident rather than something more horrible - does that even make sense?!
She leaves behind two pre-teen sons.

Thanks, 43!!

I found out Friday that Pres. Bush is trying to send me a cash bonus this Spring. Depending on what Congress decides, I could end up with about $800.00 ! Wow. I mean that - COOL !Little windfalls like that are part of what keeps the excitement going in my life - I have several areas where I can place it when it gets here - now, I will just have to decide.
Have fun spending yours !!!

When the wife is the last to know...

Last night, it happened. Right in the aisle of the church auditorium, I found out something that everyone else already knew.
I'd always asked Andy to tell me these things first; that I didn't want people to know things about out lives before I did, and here I was - the odd one out. They were all talking and laughing about something he'd done, and I had no idea. I felt so out of the loop -

he'd blogged. Twice in two days. And I had no idea.

I hope I can get over it.

psych!

Gossip in the Lounge ...

I never go into the lounge; for one, my lunch doesn't really coincide with others eating at the same time, and for the other, I just don't gossip.

My roomie comes in yesterday to say that one of our newer teachers is planning a boob-job and the others are filling her in (pardon the pun.). Now, she is lacking what some of us would like to rid ourselves of, she seeks to add. To each his own, but I don't think I'd be talking about it in the lounge. I hope it works for her, if she's determined to have it. If she gets the results she's hoping for, should she have to say anything to us?!?
Have a good weekend -

Memories from birthdays long ago

Today, I am 53 years old. I wish I understood time better; but I don't. I don't think about getting older much, but sometime it forces me to look it square in the eye and deal with it.



Today, I'm remembering being a little girl who LOVED bakery cakes. Not those HEB ones that don't have any flavor and the icing comes from a tub of Cool Whip. I'm thinking of Earl's Bakery cakes, across from the old Rick's side entrance. You could smell the goods baking at about El Castillo, and staring in the display cakes at cookies, donuts, and pies was almost sinful. I don't know when she would order it, but every year, for my birthday, my mom would order MY Earl's cake, and we would drive the whole 8 miles from Poteet to pick it up. I can feel the rich, creamy icing in my mouth today, all these years later. Such a simple thing for a kid to want - a birthday cake, but when mom was on a budget, and we DID have to come all the way from Poteet - it made my day for weeks!
Tonight, there's an Apple pie in the oven with my name on it - one of three choices I gave Andy as to what I wanted. My mouth is watering already!!
Dinner calls - see 'ya!!

Well, it's back to school tomorrow... here's hoping the Spring semester goes by as quickly as the Fall one did. I know I have more kids to screen for dyslexia, and kids being qualified for Special ed, so I'll be busy. My friend starts her last semester tomorrow - after 26 or so years, it's time. Wish I was joining her!!
The Norwood kids are out of Kenya and safe in Tanzania. They should be there about a week, then come home. I've heard the boys were willing to stay, but the girls wanted out. Imagine - a foreign country in a revolt, and wanting to come back home....
Dana left to go back to Houston today. Her life pretty well changed over the past two weeks. I'll not divulge too much, except to say that prayers are answered, even after a long, long time. I'll share more when I can.
I hope that everyone is ready for a good week, and that we all are in for a spell of good health and financial peace. Have a good one -

On Dangerous Soil

I'd ask you to pray today for Rebekah and Matthew Norwood and 4 other A & M college students. They are on a mission trip to Nairobe, Kenya right now, and if you have seen the news, you know they are in a bad place. Last night, we had multiple prayers on their behalf, and several of the elders and our minister went to their home; their parents are on the phone and internet with the other parents, trying to figure out the best course of action. As of lunch, the situation looked better than it did last night, but the decision has been made to bring them home as soon as possible. Just getting them safely to the airport is the challenge.
I've been wondering if I've ever put my life on the line for the Lord. Have I been fearless for my Saviour? Have I sacrificed any of my comfort or security to aid those who need Him?
I honor those in Kenya right now, and hope their homecoming will be quick and safe. I also hope this doesn't quench the fire in them to seek chances to serve those in foreign fields.
I'll keep you posted.

While you were sleeping

Happy New Year, friends and family!
One of my favorite movies is "While You Were Sleeping" and there's a line that fits me today. Jack and his dad are at the table, and the dad says something like, "You work hard and do you best, and then - one day- it all comes together and everyone is happy is safe."
That's me today. Somewhere in the past few months, things began to fall into place, and today - the first day of a new year, I feel that way. Erin and Gregg are starting to look at buying their first home, and Dana is in the beginning of a new relationship with a man we feel fits her like no one has before. Our lives are peaceful and, thankfully, healthy. We have been blessed this past year in so many, many ways, and it's almost scary to think about how good this all feels.
I hope your 2008 treats you as well!