Tuesday, July 10, 2012

I still...

Feeling very refective today; not sure why....
I got to thinking about this stage of my life - where I am, where I'm going.  Where I've been....


In some ways, I'm not so sure of things as I've always been - things that I thought were rock-solid are not, and I've learned that I want to control things more than I ever knew I wanted to.  But there are things that I still love, still want, and still know -


I still-
~ love my husband.  Silly to say, but these days, it's not a "given" after all these years.  Loved him from the first kiss, love him still. Lots.
~like to cuddle my daughters. Yes, they are grown up now, but nothing makes me happier.
~hear my dad.  He's been gone since 1990, but his laugh, whistle, and song leading live strong in my memory.  Can't wait to hear him in Heaven....
~like to spend time with Jackie. She makes me laugh when on one else can. She is a blessing in my life for that and many reasons.
~love to smell puppies.  Enough said -
~love Camp Bandina.  Haven't been in many, many years; but that place was a sense of strength and encouragement during my teen years when I felt alone in the church.
~really enjoy Poteet strawberries.  None better, sweeter. I remembered that this year when I had some at a friend's. 
~can sing a lot of Beatle's songs.  (After my brother's last episode in the hospital, when he couldn't remember much else, he remembered "In My Life" word for word!) Can you say influencial?!?
~miss eating large amounts of whatever I want.  Yes, I know. But I do.
~wonder what my life would have been had I made a different call on a road one summer.  Most definitely much different....
~get a kick out of teaching kids and seeing the light come on.  Nothing feels like that moment!
~wish I spoke up more.
~think sometimes about that 3rd baby I tried to talk Andrew in to when Erin was about 4.  Always assumed it would have been another girl for some reason.
~ kinda wished had more confidence in my singing. 
~ try to beat Gregg at games, although it is mostly futile. The man's a beast at winning!
~ fear dentists
~ like to swing, and look forward to getting back into one~
~ try to find the good in people and situations.
~ believe that God is in control of my life!
~ miss Smudge. Often...
~ remember songs that Mama sang to me that no one else has ever sung.
~ like to take road trips.
~ still appreciate friends from long ago that remain in my heart from a distance now.
~ am in awe of my mother-in-law and what she has meant to my husband.
~ love my home. Building it was probably one of the biggest joys of my life!
~ love my cousins. We had such fun growing up together!!
~ love the Lord's church. He was so good to give Her to us!!
~ enjoy movies like Silverado, Independence Day and Star Trek... even after watching them for years and years!!
~ look forward to going to Washington DC someday with Andrew.  He'll be amazing to watch!
~  remember where I was on Sept. 11, 2001, and when JFK was killed, and when RFK was killed, OKC exploded and so on.  Too much sorrow to forget -
~ don't get predjudice.
~ love Steve Connell for not giving up on Andrew!!