Thanks, God.

Today, I am once again reminded how glad I am that God knows so much better than I what is good for me.
My mom did not like little girls. She liked boys. She did like all the trappings of having a daughter and did not feel it necessary to teach me many of the things mothers are "supposed" to teacher their daughters to prepare them for life.
She liked to sew for me, and buy me dolls, but the parts of my life that needed a "woman's touch" were largely left undone. I resented that and held it against her for years, and in my early married life, prayed that God would give me sons; surely I would not know what to do with a girl after hearing all my life how below we were to boys.
All the time I was pregnant with Dana, I prayed for a boy. I was truly scared that I would ruin a girl, and that she would grow to feel toward me the same way I felt toward my own mother. Then, Dana was here. Now what?!?
I decided to model my mothering based on my peers and the other older women at church that I felt had good relationships with their daughters. We did fine, and then I was pregnant again. Surely now, a boy, but I was less scared, with 2 whole years of experience behind me. Enter Erin.

Almost 28 years later, today I know that history does not have to repeat itself. I have two amazing young women who make my heart burst with laughter and joy. They proved my lack of confidence wrong, that I COULD raise them to be wonderful, God-loving women with quick wits and the ability to be independent when they need to be. There sits before me proof that God took my insecurities and used His power to show me that I had what it would take. I'm glad it was one day at a time, or surely I would have given up, but in the end, it is all together wonderful.
I'm sure glad God didn't answer those prayers.

My sweetest gift, so far....

I hope everyone is feeling peaceful and happy the day after Christmas; I am home alone - Dana will be in after a while, Andy works today and tomorrow; and the Johnsons arrive Friday for the LaMore round of festivities.
We had a lovely, quiet day. Talked to Mom and Dad, ate blueberry muffins for breakfast, opened gifts, watched the latest installment of Looney Tunes, and then went to the Huttons for dinner. Delicious Cornish Game Hens - my first ever. They really wanted to build the anticipation, because they took twice the normal time to cook. A feast with friends; what more could one ask?! Thanks, R & J !
Monday, I received the sweetest gift I've gotten in a while. We'd been out and came home to wrap gifts, a call came in with a number I did not recognize. I usually don't answer, but it was Christmas Eve, so I did. This little voice asks for me, and identified herself as my little Amiga from last school year! She'd come across my number while looking at her "favorite" books, and wanted to wish me a Merry Christmas! I put "favorite" in quotes because she's one of my most severely dyslexic students ever, and to have favorite books makes me crazy!! Anyway, she clued me in on all her latest happenings - they're spending the holidays visiting all the family bars; she loves to sing with the Karaoke machines! She is writing country songs for when she becomes famous, and she got a straightener for her lovely, curly blond hair. Her little girl voice filled my heart so full joy that it was all I could do to respond. She's one of those I would bring home with me and raise, if I thought I could. I hope she calls for years to come!!
Relax, enjoy your left-over pies, and watch a good movie.
Amy

After the Fact

When Andy and I picked out the lot on which our home sits today, there was nothing but dirt and a few weeds. I wanted it because it was directly behind our friends' home, and I'd have ready access to visiting with her. No other houses were on the street.

When it came time to "Landscape" we knew we wanted nice, tall trees that would have Fall color. We bought Red Oak, Chinese Pistache, Chinese Tallow, and Burr Oak. And waited.
And waited. Slowly they grew, and with each year, we had a little more color. Our goals were coming to be!

This year, both our front and back lawns are resplendent in reds, oranges, yellows, and earthy browns. No live oak leaves falls in my yard - lovely as they are - but nice, big , bright leaves that crown the trees like a halo and then fall to gather like a rug on the ground . It is just what I envisioned all those years ago.

Nice when things turn out the way you wanted them to.

Time for a break

In two days, the Christmas break begins.

I'm ready.

Teachers are SOOOO spoiled....

Deal with it! :p

Making peace with the Devil

I teach children with dyslexia. At first, I didn't like it - in fact, I really hated the curriculum. Now, though, since I've seen it work it's "magic" with some kids, I've decided it's a good place for me to be right now. I"m the only one on my campus that teaches it, so I'm kinda alone in it, but that has it's good parts, too.

When you can't read, books (and any written word) are demonds to be conquered. By the time you're in 3rd or 4th grade, books have tortured and humiliated you enough for a life-time, and there are years yet to face them. That's why I am adamant about reading books to my classes at the beginning of each session. I find books that are low level enough for them to be able to approach them, and that have colorful illustrations and interesting pictures to draw their interest from those WORDS. As we read together, I let them feel the pages, and take time to
really take in the picture, we discuss each and every one as we go, and after a few, the books have become not quite so much a big evil monster.
Especially here at Christmas, the kids who are so grown up as to not believe in Santa anymore come around and sit with big wide eyes and wanting to take one more look or touch one more embossed illustration.
I hope one day, they will remember that Mrs. LaMore took time to go over these with them - and smile.

FYI - tomorrow's book is a picture book - not a word to be found; and it's one of my favorite!!

Name That Tune (Hymn)

I work with this woman who is very private and quiet. She doesn't often approach me, and when she does, it's usually school related. So, one day this week at lunch duty, she comes us and tells me this story: It seems she has a hymn stuck in her head, but she can't remember this certain part of a line. She begins to hum it to me, and it's one I'm familiar with, so I begin to hum it to myself, along with her. I'm sure we looked adorable, standing in the cafeteria with our heads together, humming.

Well, the kids come in, and we separate, and I forget all about it. 20 or 30 minutes later, she slides up beside me and without
saying a word, begins to sing the song again. It took me a moment to remember just what she was doing, and then I took off again. Now, we've sung every verse EXCEPT the one she can't remember. (By the way, did you know that the Baptists have different lyrics than we do? Another topic to debate, I'm sure.) Anyway, we have to part ways again, and so I'm stuck now, with this song wafting through my mind.

Finally, about 2:30, she comes up to me, and sings in a nice, soft voice, the entire verse with which we'd been struggling all day. Success at last! Now, to move on to other important tasks of the day.

The song: I can't remember!

When will it return?

I'm quite frustrated right now. It's been almost 2 months since my thyroid surgery, and my voice is still weak. I know that it will "take time", but two months of not being able to sing like I used to is getting very old. Not that I have the greatest of voices, but I do think I could hold my own and use what I had to glorify God. Now, I sit and listen with my eyes closed and praise Him in my heart.

Do you know that you can hear specific people if you listen in their direction? Randy Beard has an amazing bass voice, Alice Lester actually sings TENOR, Jackie Hutton goes to town with her voice, and Meaghan Eisenhauer sings like an angel. So, while I am lacking in ability right now, I find others taking up the slack for me, and it'll have to do for now.

I hope it won't be too much longer until I'm able to do my part again!!

Have a great weekend -

Still here!

No real news today - just wanted to check in and let everyone know I am still standing. I"ve gotten encouraging words from friends and family and reminders of what life is all about.
I'm a good teacher and a good person to work with. They are lucky to have me, and I intend to do my best to point some of that out when appropriate. I will not be bullied.

My love is hungry and on a time schedule; me - I'm finishing Christmas cards tonight!

13 school days to go.

Many people would title this blog with profanity!

Well, I guess I caught your attention with that title, now didn't I?!? The other one I considered for today's post was, "I'm the queen of Non-confrontation!" Take your pick.
I will do ANYTHING to stay out of trouble. I've swallowed lots of feelings and thoughts throughout the years to avoid trouble and fights. Sometimes it works, sometimes not.
Yesterday, I made my boss furious with me. I made a decision based on what I thought was best, and to say the least, she REALLY disagreed with it. I was called in and, while she didn't for once curse, there is no doubt in my mind that she really wanted to. In about 20 minutes time, she let me know exactly what she thought of me and threatened me with being written up - I assured her that will not be necessary. When asked about someone else who was also in my predicament, I told her that she was scared of being in trouble, and she looked me dead in the eyes and said, "And maybe you should have been, too." Should an employee be AFRAID of a boss? I feel a little old to be playing these games right now, myself.

Andy took me out to eat ribs at Chili's - he knows how meat calms my soul. Leaving the restaurant, full and greasy, I met one of the dearest little boys I've ever taught coming in for their dinner. He ran and hugged me, and his mother said very kind things about me. Suddenly, the afternoon felt far away and insignificant - I'm good at what I do, and I make children happy. Isn't that what teaching is all about?

Pray that I can let go of this.

Nature vs. Nurture

Which is it - the genetics and pre-dispositions put into us before we are born, or the very house and parents that determine our lives; our personalities, success, happiness? I used to really believe it was nature; be sure to check the horse's teeth before you buy it and all that stuff. There was a boy in my hometown I really liked and wanted to date, but mom squelched that before it ever got a chance because he came from "bad seed."
I had an email from my sister today, which I read over and over again. Our lives, while having grown up in the same house with the same parents, could not be farther apart. It is like reading something from someone I don't even know - how did her life get where it is? Maybe my life was intended to go in that direction also, but God blessed me with Andrew and His church, and I am the one who changed. Whatever it is, I am eternally greatful.
Each day, as my students come and go from my room, I think about their lives, and where they will end up. Some truly were born with disabilities, and some were just born in a home that did not know how to foster them to their highest potential. Where one stops and the other starts is a mystery. I guess the answer is to make the most of what life offers us.

Back at Home

Well, after a few days away, we are home. Houston was cool and cloudy - Andy's favorite weather for Thanksgiving. Dana was our Hostess; Erin and Gregg provided a delicious brunch for us Thursday morning. We had a wonderful time, and got home in time to see the Ags beat the s not out of UT !!
On Thursday, we ate dinner at my sister-in-law's home. All the nieces and nephews were there, and everyone but my other sister-in-law was there. As I sat around the table and watched my grown-up neices and nephews all around me, I was struck by what a blessed family the LaMore's are. All the kids are well-mannered, and healthy and intelligent. We are the only members of the clan who live away, so our visits are sporadic at best, but I feel close to them none the less. I hope they all think kindly of their Aunt Amy.
Well, I hope you had a good Thanksgiving as well; it's so important to sit back and relax before the great activity of the holidays come full-swing.

Frustration, thy name is computer !!

Grr, Grr, Grr. I've written, and for some reason, it's not posting. Not Pulitzer Prize stuff, mind you, but still... hopefully, this one will go through.
Yesterday was the "anniversary" of my father's death. 17 years. How could it have already been that long without him? I didn't at the time, but as days and years go by, with major life events coming and going, I feel cheated. When he died, I was relieved, because he was so badly injured and I didn't want him existing in his body without his quick wit and loving spirit around us, but now I know - he should have hung around a lot longer for us all.
I'm a lot more like my dad than my mom. In good ways and in bad, I am his daughter. He made me feel safe and while he was not a gushy kind of dad, I knew he loved me a lot. We did things -- just the two of us, and I miss that.
If I could talk to him today, I'd tell him how much I look forward to being reunited with him for eternity. He loved the whole idea of "church" and what it brought to our lives, and he was quite the song leader. Tempo meant nothing to him except sing it loud and sing it fast. I hear him in my head as I type these words. "Kneel at the Cross"....
Someday, I'll be a grandma, and I hope to Heaven that I'm as cool a grandma as Daddy was a grandpa. Cardboard boxes to play in and wagons to ride in. Swings to push high in the air! And lots and lots of whistling!

Happy Birthday, Margaret

Today is my mother's birthday. She would be 80. Wow. It's hard to realize that 6 years have passed since she died, very suddenly one Sat. morning. I was impatient with her the night before; she was fussing about our plans for the next day, and I was trying to cook dinner - I needed her to get OFF THE PHONE! My last words: "I'll talk to you tomorrow when we get home, mom. Good-bye." I don't feel guilty about that; we had lots of conversations like that, so what was one more. I truly don't feel guilty about anything in regards to my life with her; I just wish...
but wishes don't come true, and you can't change the past. You don't get too many second choices to undo the seemingly harmless things that come back to bite you in the rear. I was a good daughter, and I lay my head down at night knowing that, but I wish...
I hope that Joe Beam is right, that in the hereafter she is looking "down" on my life and knows how I feel about the whole "relationship" thing. I've made peace with a lot of junk and have grown amazingly stronger because of how she raised me.
I hope that when people hear me talk about my mom, that I honor her and leave the other stuff for me and me alone. She gave me all she had and then some, and for that alone I love her.
In case you didn't know her, she was artistic, beautiful, crafty, diligent, extravagant, faithful, generous, hospitable, inquisitive, jovial, kind, loving, menacing, neurotic, open, petulant, quizical, rebellious, smart, talkative, understanding (sometimes!), verbal, will-full, x-troverted, and zealous.
Happy birthday, Mom.

Dave Ramsey, I wish I'd never met you!!

I've written before about how Andy and I are disciples of Dave. We are grateful for how we've been able to "see a better way" and get ourselves into better financial situations. Andy is happier than he has been in years, and it is nice to see a brighter future.

BUT I WANT TO BUY STUFF!!! Right now, I'm having a really, really hard time holding back on some major purchases, like new furniture, and doing some stuff around the house that needs it big-time. But, Oh No, not when you live according to Dave and haven't got it all saved up!! GRRRR !

We had a budget meeting Sat., and things are moving along where we need them too. My surgeries have set us back some, but we are still way ahead of where we started. Last night, I broke a tooth. Yep. Saturday morning, my dentist wasn't in the running of where I wanted to spend money; now, he's WAY at the top. Good news is, it isn't hurting, so I have time. Wait, that's what put me in this mess to begin with!

I shouldn't be complaining, but I really could go with a nice afternoon of swiping plastic and not thinking about the bill. Therapy - escapism - living in a dream world. Yep. Big time.

A long, long week....

Few weeks wreck havoc in the lives of teachers as does Red Ribbon Week. It usually falls right about the time of grades due and Halloween, which makes for a "testy" mood among the adults, at least. But, we plod onward, and try to enjoy the festivites of the week amid a school year where not a lot of fun stuff happens.
This year, our "theme" for RRW was High School Musical. We played snipets over the intercom, we played the sound track during lunch, and our Rally was based on the theme, "We're all in This Together."(one of the "hit" songs, if you are not familiar with the show." It was fun to watch the kids who either LOVE it or HATE it - "Miss, that song AGAIN!", and I feel that for the most part, our committee (of which I was NOT a part) hit it on the head this year. Participation was great, although my SPURS earrings broke on the day we wore sports stuff- and the week ended with success with team building tug-o-wars. If it was just that easy to stick the message that RRW teaches - stay with buddies and away from drugs - then we wouldn't have another thing to worry about. However -

on the way to the playground the first day, a little girl, skipping with glee, came up and said, "Mrs. LaMore, why are we celebrating High School Musical this week?!?" Somedays, the message just doesn't translate the way we imagined!

A Chance Encounter at MacAlister's

This morning, Andy greeted me with the news that he "had to goto Borders" to use his discount points or lose them. So, we quickly pulled ourselves together, and up the road we went. Nothing like a bookstore and lunch out to get me moving on a Sat. morning.
We decided it was too late for lunch, so what now? I suggested MacAlister's Deli - Erin introduced us in College Station - and he went for it. I like it for two reasons, and forgive me if I've shared this before; but they have GREAT sweet tea and such a large menu that you could eat there for a month and never have the same thing twice. We got there just a little after they opened, and pretty much had the place to ourselves.
Here's where the encounter comes in. A little family was just ahead of us in line, with their little girl - maybe 4 years old. She was jumping up and down in place quietly as mom and dad ordered. I asked them, with a grin on my face, if she woke up like that. Dad laughed and said they put her to bed doing the same thing. Normally, that would send bells and whistles off in my head, but today, it had me chuckling. We ordered and took our place.
In a minute, here came the little family to sit on the row next to us. As I ate, the little one kept peeking through the curtain to "flirt" with me and I played back with here, until her mom told her to "leave the lady alone." She did. As we left, I stopped by to wish them a good day. Mom and dad may think I'm a looney, but it just felt like the right thing to do.
Especially in the city, we avoid eye contact and speaking, like someone is going to rob us or worse. I don't like that about how things are, and if I can't speak to a precious little girl on a beautiful Sat. morning, then I give up. I hope they felt as good as I did for the rest of the morning.
Bring on those encounters to us all!!

Who do you honor?

It seems like, lately, I keep thinking of the word honor. I have a little card I found at a shop one time that says, "May all I do and say today honor Christ in every way." I keep it at school and try to look at it daily. It helps me focus on my goal - to honor Christ. I don't always do the job I'd like to - after all, I do work with kids! :) But it is my desire to honor His life, His sacrifice, and His reign as Lord.
Honor isn't easy. To put someone's benefit ahead of your own is not always an American trait, especially now-a-days. It's Me first, second and maybe 3rd, and then others. To know that my words, facial expressions, reactions, and decisions reflect directly on how others see Christ is overwhelming at best. How can I do it without giving people an excuse to not see the Saviour as I do? How can I show Him as One worthy when I mess up? I want people to quit looking at Jesus as someone just to be thought of on Sundays, but to be held in great esteem all day, every day.
I also need to honor others. Our society is too casual with its relationships, and we don't hold people up as they deserve. I honor Andy with my life - he chose me and gives his earthly life for my benefit, and he is also worthy of my respect and admiration. I've come to love and honor the other elders as men who seek Him, and so I honor them... and my life is happier when I treat them with the honor they deserve.
I could go on... in fact, I will. I honor Gregg as my son-in-law for being the leader of Erin's and his home. I honor my boss, and those in governmental authority, even when I don't agree with them. Their position alone calls me to do this. And I feel better when I do.
I'm not sure where all this came from - perhaps as I dealt with surgery and came to respect the man who literally had my life in his hands - his expertise and desire to help others moved me. It helped me to realize that in this life, honor is a small thing to give but a great thing to receive.

I just hope I'm doing it right!

"Look on the sunny side"

I admit it; I'm an optimist. I grew up one, and I hope to continue in that mode until I'm gone. Life has enough to bring one down without it being what you choose to dwell on. Like the old song title says, "Look on the Sunny Side,"...

Case in point; this weekend. Our Ladies' Retreat. Hill Country. Beautiful weather, almost perfect, but not quite cool enough for me. Women I've known for years and newbies I'm learning to love, and nothing to do but enjoy them. Kim and Lorene did it all but arrange the date, and that was my big contribution. Whooee! We sang, we ate, we played, we studied. We loved on each other, and we missed friends who couldn't be there. It was what I needed, except for my comfy bed!
There have been a couple of things happen along the way that could steal my joy and refreshment from the weekend, but I choose not to dwell on them. People will try to take joy from you, but I won't let them, and I won't let my own thoughts interfere with the great memories I have formed in my mind. My mom always told me that you are as happy as you choose to be, and so I choose great happiness.
The highlight of my weekend? One would have to be watching Mildred Royal learn to play Catch Phrase with us. I hope I have her willingness to learn new things when (and if) I am in my 90s.
A weekend in the Hill Country. God is so good!!

My kids at school have been so cute since I've been back. The 1st two I saw, my Jimmy with the cartoon voice and my "tweener" Zoe, came running in to my classroom and took turns in my lap. Not really "legal" to hold a kid on your lap anymore, but who cares?! Jimmy just kept saying, "You're back, you're back!" over and over. He's the only one that wanted to touch my incision, so I let him after I inspected his fingers, and he made the appropriate noises and grimmaces. Man, I love everything about that little boy. (Gregg and Erin - I'll take one just like him; a stinker with a big, big heart! :) ) Zoe stood her distance and asked lots of questions, like, " how close did they come to cutting your head all the way off?" I patiently let them ask whatever they wanted, for the past two days, and have tried to answer them with careful but truthful answers. I've never felt like you should shelter kids from reality, especially if they ask. The thing about 3rd and 4th graders is that they - for the most part - are pure in their questions. They haven't figured out the "polite" way to put things, so when they ask about "all those ugly bruises" on my arms (I'm a hard stick!) they are just concerned. In their own ways, they've made me feel very loved and wanted. Not a bad thing when it comes to where you spend the majority of your days.
Good news, I hope. One part of all my blood work was a test for Dr. Massey - he called it a "tumor chaser." Lovely. He said they like to keep track every so often to see if any of those pesky cancer cells have hidden somewhere. So, several days have passed, and I've not heard from him to come in. I'm taking that as a good report!! Thanks, Father!!!
Well, tomorrow is Wednesday. I'm going to bed.
Sweet dreams!

God's Face

Growing up in the church of Christ, I've never had a picture of Jesus hanging on my bedroom wall or in the auditorium at church; in fact, when I went to my grandmothers, I'd almost cover my eyes to avoid "idol worship" caused by looking at hers. I was always taught that we were not given "graven images" in order to avoid worshipping the wrong thing, and I've read those scriptures about people dying because they saw the face of God. I know all that.

But today, I really needed to see the face of my Father. I wasn't there, spiritually, and I yearned to focus on Who it was I was there to honor. On other occasions, I've closed my eyes and just tried to focus on the whole Heaven thing, while avoiding His face. Didn't work today - too many distractions to filter. It would have been so very helpful just to see the One my heart and soul ache to praise. To have the tangible amid the ordinary would have taken my breath away, which is what worship should do to us -
I'm really hoping this weekend, on the Retreat, that I have that glimpse of Him!

First Impressions

Lately, I've been very aware of first impressions. I guess it's because I've been in lots of new places for the 1st time - mainly doctors' offices and such, and have had a lot of opportunities to watch people I'm unfamiliar with. It has been enlightening, to say the least.
Here's my conclusion; most people are just in too big of a rush to realize how awful they come across. Even on the phone, it feels like you're killing someone to make them converse with you for just a second before you commence business.
When I forgot a paper at my surgeon's on Tues., I had to call back to have them send it to me for work. The lady I was speaking to actually said, "You want me to MAIL that to you?!?" Okay, I could hear all the commotion in the background, but I wasn't just making this up to torment her. When I explained I lived an hour away, she wanted my fax number. (Andy and I are archaic, I know, we don't actually HAVE a fax here at home.) I gave up, called the school and got their fax number, and called the woman back with that number.
All I can say is, I always hope I realize the impression I am making on those I meet or deal with on the phone. I surely don't want to the be subject of their blog that day!!

Have a good weekend!!

The sky is clear!!

Yippee - the "fog" has lifted!! By far, the fog of the anesthesia from my surgeries has been the most frustrating. The pain and discomfort has not been fun - that's for sure - but not being really "with it" for a week or so is not my choice of how to be. Am I 100% ? Not by a long shot, but my sentences are more than 3 words and I'm catching on more to what is being said around me, and I'll take every little bit.

Andy is home again with me today. Tomorrow, we see the good Dr. Brown for stitch removal and nose opening, and then Andy goes back to work on Wed. I sure like having him around; a little preview of retirement, perhaps?

Speaking of - here's my plan for life after teaching. I think we sell the house and pick a place on the map we'd like to live. Go find a little rental, and live there a year. Meet new Christians and see new things, and then do it all over again. 5 places in 5 years - then we settle somewhere in a neutral zone between the girls and their lives.
Andy's not convinced yet... but I've got time on my side!! My first destination - the Pacific West Coast!!

Better Late Than Never

My dad was born Sept. 27, 1920, and he died in 1990.He was 70 years old, and the accident was on his only sister's birthday. He'd been over to eat lunch with her, and left the house on his bike. Since retirement, he spent time riding around looking for cans to cash in - like he needed the money! She'd had some bad birthdays before, a few people she loved had died on her birthday, and so she hated to "celebrate" it; but daddy went over anyway. As he attempted to cross the highway, something happened, and he was hit by a man in a truck. He lingered in a coma for exactly one month, and died on Nov. 18th, 1990.
For many years, the date of his birthday would come and go, and I'd be busy with school or the girls, or life in general, and I would feel so badly when I'd realized I'd forgotten. I forgot this year as well. It seems that, as I get older, it's more important to me to remember him, and mom, and to point out to others that they WERE. Their lives shaped my in every way, and especially this week with the surgery, I've been thinking alot about Daddy. It's actually a pretty gross story, but oh, well.
When I was in elementary school, Daddy had to have nose surgery. My nose is "his" nose (as is Dana's), with a little square on the end.(I also have his dimple in my chin when I lose weight!) Anyway, he had these really large polyps taken out of his nose, and when he came home, boy he was miserable!! The doctor had him all packed up with cotton, and he was all bruised. The best part, though, were the polyps themselves!! I actually got to take them to school in a baby-food jar and show my classmates!! What a treasure!! I'm sure my teachers were thrilled, but tolerated my enthusiasm as long as possible.
Well, luckily for my co-workers, I won't be going back to school with "trophies" to share! I'll just have to hang on to the memory of that adventure I had with Dad - sure wish he was here!!

Home again

Well, the deed is done; I am thyroid-less and have a new non-deviated septum. I also have a killer headache.

The surgery went very well; my thyroid was large and growing up under my collarbone, which is quite sore as I type. I also have a yard or two of packing up my nose, which is a little more than uncomfortable and makes my lips very dry from all the mouth-breathing. Other than those little complaints, I am fine. Andy took off the bandage today as the doc ordered and my neck in noticably smaller from every angle. Tomorrow, I get to shower and shampoo this nasty hair, and then I'm sure I'll be even better. I'm not sure how I'm going to cover this big smiley mouth on my neck when I go back to school; I don't want to gross out the kids. I may need Andy to go buy me a delicate little scarf for the first few days.

One thing I really like about surgery is the maching they put on my legs to keep blood clots away. They "puff' every few seconds, which constricts my feet and lower legs, and it feels like a constant massage. The nurses tell my most patients complain about them, but I love it. I'd buy one if I could - except for the hassle of taking them off to go to the bathroom.

So, that's it for the surgery news. I"m really hoping this is it for a long, long time. I asked God for something the night before, and it worked out, so I'm figuring I'm cool for a while.

Thanks for your prayers and well-wishes. I'm very blessed.

In olden days...

Yesterday was Homecoming for PHS. There is quite an odd feeling about seeing 9 and 10 year old boys and girls in mums and garters - and while I shook my head in disbelief, I also know I made mums for my girls when they were that age. Somewhere, we've lost the total concept of what "Homecoming" is and stands for.
It made me remember my old mums from the late 60's and newly born 70's. Those gigantic, live mums that were the size of a dinner plate and only came in white. Their smell fills my mind right now - the one aspect not replicated in the new century. They were so beautiful in their simplicity; a green back medallion, a few ribbons with glittery letters and a pipe-cleaner "P" for the good-old high school. Picked up the day before, they were gorgeous until about 2nd period, where the petals began to turn brown from handling and some actually falling out leaving great holes. By game-time, some looked quite sad. Then, hung to the wall at home, they died a slow, memory-filled death.
I've been to Homecoming in Poteet I think once since I married. At our 10 year reunion, Cathy and I stood in the front of mom and dad's house, mums on our shoulders. We were beautiful, and so much smarter that in high school. To come back and see how lives have changed (or NOT!) is the real focus of Homecoming. To touch base with the past, and to focus on what that time really meant in the grand scheme of things.
To see those people who were so "IT" and are stuck in that time, to run across a favorite teacher and let them see that their faith in you was not misplaced. That's what the mum is really all about.

Lots of random nothings...

Sorry about the long void of posts... I come home from school so tired that nothing is getting done right now. I am ready for this surgery to be over with so that I can see how I feel. I really am planning on being less tired and having more pep about me. I'm ready for Amy to be back....

One of my 4th graders said, with a very worried face,"But I thought if they cut your throat, you died!" I assured him that 's why the docs get the big bucks!

Sat., Andy and I have our date to see Spyro Gyra. I hope he loves every minute of it - to me, jazz kinda all sounds alike, but he DID go see Josh Groban with me. A night out at a nice venue with my man - I'll be in heaven in no time.

The ground is hard and dry - how can that be after 40 consecutive rainy days? I walk across the playground at lunch, and the grass is brown and brittle and the cracks show in the soil. Weather is a funny thing. Feast or famine.

Well, I need to go fix dinner. I'm looking forward to not having to cook a lot next week. See - don't I sound grumpy?!? I want ME back!!!

News

Earlier in the week; Andy and I met with Dr. Brown, the guy who's taking out my thyroid. I very likeable fellow; laughing eyes and a quick wit - gentle hands around my throat. The visit started off on a bad note, though; they sprayed this deading down my nostrils, and it was nasty - gagged me and made me jump sky high! That did not sit well with me - I like to know what's coming! Anyway - once Dr. Brown came in and we chatted a bit, he began to look in my nose. His eyes widened, and he proceeded to inform me that my septum is very deviated!! So, after he takes out my thyroid, he's going to do a little rinoplasty!! It's apparently a win-win deal; no bruising or swelling and little pain. I'll sleep much better and breathe through my nose for the first time on that side. Nothing will change externally, so you'll recognize me next time we meet after that -
My insurance is going to begin to wonder if I'm trying to come up with these duo-surgeries if I don't stop soon!! Hey, why not get the most out of those anesthestiologists and operating rooms while I can!!

The date: Tuesday, Oct. 2, 2007 - 11:30 am. Please pray.

Happy B'Day, Andrew

Happy Birthday, Dear Andrew!!

We spent the weekend in Houston, staying at Mom and Dad's to visit at celebrate Andy's turning 53. We had lunch on Sat. with all 3 kids, then back to Dana's place to have Cake and yummy strawberries. Andy nor his parents have seen Dana's apt., so that was fun - she's made herself a nice, homey nest. Later, we played games and had a light dinner at Jason's Deli; then we headed back to visit a little more with the folks.

On Sunday, we worshipped at West Houston. Such a friendly, welcoming place. I think Dana's beginning to find her spot, and it's nice to hear the joy back in her voice. Transitions are hard, but she's coming around again.

Anyway, back to my sweet husband. He got tickets to the upcoming Spyro-Gyra concert from me, and the Planet Earth dvds from the kids. I hope he thinks it was a good birthday; as exciting as they get at our age!!
He's my guy, and I'm so glad we got to spend the day together!! No one else I'd rather be with on any given day -

Qualities of a wife

For several years now, Andy has served as an elder in our local congregation. After being a Christian for a long time and serving as a Deacon in two different places, he was approached about being considered to serve as an elder. We were humbled and honored. We both knew the "qualifications" that scripture puts out for us, which describe a man of maturity and wisdom, of good reputation and worthy to be both a leader and a model. After the process made its way through, Andy began to serve.

Several times during this adventure, I've thought about the qualities of an elder's wife. Surely, I've known many different ladies in my life, those of every temperment and personality type. I've tried to find commonality amongst my fellow elders' wives, and I'll be honest - we don't all have a lot in common or seek each other out as a unit.

However, I have come to see one - perhaps the most important- quality that we all appear to have. We have the honor of sharing our husbands with the whole church; sometimes to our dismay. Dinners go uneaten, movies interrupted, and plans changed at the last minute. To be truthful, there's a part of me that sometimes loses focus and recalls the days when there weren't these demands placed on our lives; but that is the reason we waited until the girls were gone to college before we took this work on. They deserved a full-time dad, and especially not parents under the microscope.

I'm pretty glad there isn't a list somewhere that delegates how elders' wives are supposed to be - I find myself pretty different from most of the other wives and that would be a problem. I draw strength from a couple of fellow wives who encourage and uplift me and I love them to death. I'm just going to love my husband and try to make his service to others an easier and more joyful situation. Perhaps that's my biggest job of all.

Where - and why - did they all go?

We are about to get a new church directory. Usually, I notice the big change is that the babies are not babies anymore, or that some dear ones that were with us before have gone on go be with God. In looking at this directory, I'm going to be missing some really dear people who have moved on from us since the last directory.

About 2 years ago now, we had an exodus. Almost 40 families that were with us are no longer calling us their church family. Some moved due to jobs, some moved due to retirement, but the majority of them moved due to situations that should not have happened. It wasn't a big, ugly split like you read about, but just a departure. We were too traditional, we were too liberal; we were too inclusive, we were racist. I guess, bottom line, we just were not what those people wanted.

Even now, I grieve over this; why I don't know. Andy and I have moved our membership from place to place before - life goes on. You make new friends. We've almost added back in number those we lost, they are great people and we love them dearlym but just think where we'd be if we were ALL here, worshipping together.

If I could put all those people in a room together, I'd tell them that I love them, that I miss them and what they brought to the brotherhood here in Pleasanton. That I wish they'd talked more to us before deciding to go. That they'd given us a chance to come to an agreement on what it was that took them from us.

All I can do now is to really love the folks God has given to us even more; to make this the place they want to be, so that we never go through a time like that again. If we can learn from this and become more the church God plans for us, then perhaps that is the good that came of this. I've got to believe something good is ours for the taking, or it will all be in vain.

Books, books and more books

Today, I took my kids to the library for the 1st time this year. Since they miss their regular library time with their class to meet with me each day, it's usually just the 4 or 5 of us with the whole library to ourselves. (Yes, Dana, I said 4 or 5 - I have a tough job!!)


This year, I worked it out with the librarian to come with all classes on the same day, so I basically camped out there. As the schedule fell, the last two groups actually are coming with their classes, so that fills the room up nicely. We help them search for books on the computer, and monitor them to make sure they are getting books on their reability levels. I always have a little one who reads 1st grade level and wants Harry Potter.
Or they only want Great White Sharks and no other shark book will do.

One little girl, who I don't work with, wanted to read me a portion of her book. She dragged up her chair next to mine, and promptly took off. She was having the best day ever, sharing a book with a teacher. I would never have had the nerve to approach a teacher with that request, which made it all the more something I was glad to be part of. Unfortunately, library time was over before we read the fate of Sacagawea, but I think I've heard the story once before.
Well, we made it through with everyone happily finding the perfect book to last us until next time. Now, if we can all just remember to get back to school with it in good condition!!

God Calling

I love storms. I know a lot of people are frightened by them, but they have always been something I have taken pleasure in.

Right now, as I type, I hear loud, rumbling symphonies of thunder to the west. It's been going on for a while, and the power of its message to me is that God is near. I know, people "see" God in nature; a sleeping baby, a rainbow, a sunrise or sunset. I take pleasure in those beautiful sights as well, but for me, it's the sound of the thunder that moves me most. I find great comfort in the fact that all is working as it should, and that the storm that came will pass, and that my God is in control of it all. I think I've especially enjoyed it so much this summer because of the drought we've been through - the silence of the thunder was lonesome. The oddest part is, I didn't realize how much I'd missed it until it came back.

Coming, here, then gone again.

This past weekend, we had Gregg, Erin, and Roarke for a visit. It was a nice, quiet break after a long first week of school, and I had really gotten excited to have them come. Anticipation is a great thing!

We didn't do a whole lot of exciting things - laughed and commiserated with Roarke and his head cone, went out to eat, and worshipped with everyone yesterday. Several of Erin's church friends were home for the long weekend, so they got to catch up on things, which was nice. Then, we had Erin's requested lunch (meat loaf, corn, mashed potatoes, and peach cobbler), quick dozes for naps, and then, they were gone.

Wait! I'm not ready! It went too fast. But we'll visit again in Houston in a couple of weeks, Lord willing. And perhaps Roarke won't have to be wearing the cone!!

Taking the Bad with the Good

After all these long summers of drought, this past summer was a wondrous relief. Not once did I have to drag along the hose and reposition the sprinkler head, or watch in dismay as my plants struggled to stay alive in the heat. Instead of the horrid, dry brown of summer grass, we were treated all along to lovely green fields, with ponds full of water! I never failed to appreciate one day of this change in climate. Until lately...

The BUGS!! They are everywhere, of every type and every smell! Tonight, Andy and I treated ourselves to burgers before church, and INSIDE the place, there were bugs. Crawling along with windowsill, and even getting onto our paper wrappers before we spied them! I caught myself grumbling about all the rain bringing them out, and then I remembered:
you have to take the bad along with the good.

I'll take a few bugs every summer!!

TGIF Big Time!

Wow - a week since my last posting. Had no idea. It's been a week of motivational speakers (great, by the way!), team-building, celebrating reaching Recognized by TEA, a biggie; procedures, elections, etc, etc. Coming home with feet very angry at all the hard work after being pretty lazy all summer, a sore back from sitting in little hiney chairs at Primary, and so on. Too tired and pre-occupied to post....



Thursday was "Meet the Teacher Night." I wish I could explain to those of you not teachers how the beginning of school feels; at least at the Elementary level. Shiny, happy yet hesitant faces looking at class lists to see who the teacher will be. Parents coming in carrying $50. worth of school supplies that will be used up by Nov., new shoes and clothes and haircuts. Familiar faces you want to kiss - or hide from - and new ones you want to know. I love it every year.



I work in an old building called the Alamo because the facade in the front "looks like" the Alamo in SA. Every year, parents come in to bring their children to meet their teachers and exclaim, "This is where I went to school! Boy, it looks different!" Not better, necessarily, but different. They want to stand there in the halls and remember how it felt, and return to those days of their youth. It's always a neat thing to witness.



Now, the kids come. The doors will unlock at 7:50 Monday, and by 8:30, it will feel like we never had summer. Halls quiet, kids listening, teachers instructing. It's a wonderful day, full of new friends, and high hopes.

I love the beginning of school!

Erin, Crystal, followed soon by Dean

It's been a busy few days. My cousin's daughter and her family came to visit for a few days in the middle of storm Erin. That was an adventure for them - they actually went to Sea World the day it blew in, and made it to 3 shows before the park closed. (They went back yesterday and had a wonderful time.) We enjoyed our time with them, and I've become re-acquainted with the Disney Channel and sippie cups! They have 2 cute kids, who entertained us mightily and we got to know her husband, whom we'd not been around very much. I'm glad they came.

In the middle of Erin, I had to go to Region 20 in SA for some dyslexia training. Scary driving, but I got home safely. The only tragedy of the day was that I opted to stay there and not go out to eat with some of my cohorts. They came back full but drenched; I was dry and hungry.

Now, it looks like Dean may be coming our way. All the hype before school starts really is not the way I'd like to end my summer, but that is how it appears to be shaping up. Andy wants to go stock up on water and canned food; I wanted to go buy new shoes. (I hope Erin, Gregg and Dana stay safe and dry in Houston!)

Hope you are having a good weekend -

Mrs.Jeckle/Mrs. Hyde

It's happened. I felt it last night at the Huttons; my school persona has reared it's ugly head again. Oh, well - it was nice while it lasted.

We met the Huttons at the beginning of summer in about 1995. They'd just moved out of SA, and our families hit it off immediately - our girls the same age as their boys, active in church - it was a natural fit. That summer, we grew closer and closer, spending premium time together. It was great.

Then, August came. School. Schedule. Jackie saw a side of me she'd not met before. Tired, grumpy, preoccupied. Our fun time dwindled down to weekends at best, but we hung on. When May came, and I was really all those previously mentioned states, she actually told someone to watch out, that I became "mean" at the end of school. Then, we were back to the good old summer, and I was back to the Amy she'd met a year before.

Well, it's August again, and the party's over. Last night, after sitting in training all day, I felt old, tired, and grumpy. Sorry. I'm going to work on those good traits this year, so the "good Amy" is around more. I like her a lot better!!

Have a good day!

So, who's watching?

I've been SO hungry for pizza lately! I want it all the time, and Andy has placated me when he couldn't hush me. Don't know why, but it's been annoying! So, the other day, I took myself to the Pizza Hut for buffet, all by myself, and worked to quell that little craving. Good salad, good pizza, good people-watching.
After I'd been there a while, a little boy approached me. He looked like a ragamuffin from a movie; disheveled hair, cock-eyed ball cap, mis-matched clothes. Cute, blond and dirty; like kids I see at school. Couldn't place him, so I was curious that he'd walk right up to me.

"Are you still a teacher?"
"Yes."
"Do you still teach at the Elementary?" Kinda shy, quiet questions coming from this little stranger.
It was bugging me, because I take pride in noticing these little lost ones, and he was not ringing any bells.
"What grade are you going to be in this year?" I thought this would help place him; he was tiny.
Big grin: "6th."
"Did you have a good summer?" Safe, obscure question. Don't want to hurt his feelings that I don't know him from Adam.
"Yes."
I see that his dad has left their table and is heading to pay and leave.
"You have a good year and make good grades, okay?"
"Yes ma'am. You have a good year too."

I kept thinking after he left, and I still don't know who he is. But sometime in his last couple of years, he noticed me. And, luckily, I came across as approachable and friendly. Thank God for that - and I hope I remember him as this new year begins; each and every one of those little ones I meet everyday deserve to feel as important as I hope I made him feel on our chance encounter meeting at Pizza Hut on a hot August day.

So, that's why I was craving pizza!

Missing Palmer....

Many years ago, I began reading Palmer's blog; only the second blog I'd ever ventured into. He was a young minister with a baby and a dying wife. I got caught up in their story, and have followed it to this day. Palmer remarried and has since also died of almost the same cancer that killed his wife before him. Lately, I've really missed hearing what Palmer had to say - and so yesterday I went back into his archives and read his last few months of postings. It made me so sad, once again to think of one with so young and vital a life cut so short.

Then I began to think of the other husbands this summer who have died too young. My cousin Bobby was only 57, and a couple of weeks ago, a co-worker lost her husband at only 64. Three women, all widows when they thought they had many years ahead with their spouses face nights alone.


Andy and I do not sleep cuddled up. We both like to sleep in our own space, but we do cuddle a bit before we say our "Goodnights." Sometimes it lasts longer than others, depending on how hot the night air is or how late or tired we are, but it's enough to know that we've had another day together.


I hope I never take it for granted.

Latest good news

Some days, you just can't think of a thing to say. Another day of my summer break has passed, and I don't have anything to show for it. Andy and I are both really, really tired from our busy weekend, and I was waiting to hear from Erin, so I just let the day go by, resting. Usually, I don't mind treating Monday as a rest day, but the closer school gets to starting, the fewer Mondays I have left.

On Friday, Andy went with me to get the results of my tests from Dr. Cruz. Good news: all was benign!! I do appear to have what is called Dr. Hashimoto's Thyroidism, so I'll be seeing an ENT surgeon in the next couple of weeks to set up getting my thyroid out. It is about the size of a small orange, and will continue to grow, so out it will come. It should be a much less stressful surgery than I faced before, with a shorter recoup time.

I am so grateful to God for the good report once again. I'll keep you posted. Let's assume this will be the last trial for a good, long while!

The Things We Hold On To

Andy calls my dresser and its surrounding area the "Black Hole" - a reference to piles of stuff on both the dresser and its floor. Sometimes, the term is used with a chuckle in his voice, but lately (all summer) it's had a bit of a tinge of frustration that I hear. I don't blame him; it's awful. It makes me shut my door when people come over, and he's threatened a few times to just go in and throw away all that is involved. I know it's a "thing" with me - good intentions each day and all that - but for whatever the reason, I can't bring myself to tackle the chore.

One of the items I deal most with is my bunny. I'm 52 years old, and I still have my stuffed bunny that I slept with as a little girl. The wire in its ear pokes out, and there isn't much stuffing, but I can't bring myself to throw it out. I know neither girl wants the thing, and I should just have Andy do it while I am out to save me from it, but there it lays, bringing back memories of comfort and security.

This is my promise for all to see; the Black Hole will be dealt with this coming week. Now some of you will hold me to it, and Andy will be a happy, happy man.
I will be, too, when all is said and done; it's just getting started.

Is there a 12 Step Program for Procrastinators???

Hard work with a little fun thrown in....

Home from Houston... tired but satisfied. Didn't help as much as Dana probably needed, but I did a fair number of boxes. Lots of moral support, if that counts for anything! Last thing I did before leaving town was to see her new school home and meet a couple of co-workers - made a good impression. I love looking at schools, and this one seems a happy place for kids.

Tuesday night, while Gregg was out with his buds, Erin came and picked us up. We ate at Macalister's Deli - great sweet tea - and then went to see Hairspray. It was SO fun - lots of memories of my preteen years of the early 60s; American Bandstand on a Sat. morning, girls in dresses only, segregation. I laughed outloud during most of it and then giggled at recollections all night afterwards. A wonderful night with my grown daughters. I'm so glad they are close!!

Now I'm back for a busy weekend - get biopsy results tomorrow, Bourne movie date with the man of my dreams, Game night on Saturday and then the elders' luncheon at our home Sun. lunch. Two weeks of summer to go - school is crossing my mind like it does come Aug. 1.

Life is good.

Ta-Da!!

Today was an adventure. Andy and I went into SA for my thyroid biopsy, and it went like clockwork. The nicest technician took some scans first, then it was time to meet the doctor. They both agreed my thyroid was "not pretty; a mess", but not the worse they'd seen.



I was pretty cool about the whole thing until he announced right before starting that he didn't think he'd use the deadening- "it's just another poke, and that needle's a lot bigger than the one for the biopsy." Let's just say my attention was all his; and the tech's hand was nicely squeezed!! They both assured me that if I was "uncomfortable" after the first poke, they'd deaden me then. Oh, thanks!



Three pokes later, all "dead on center", and it was all done. Now we wait another week for the results, but I'm thinking it's all good.



I'll keep you posted.

"...for whom the phone rings...."

My post today begins with the "the bell tolls for thee" reference, because of the way my day began.

Telephones are great inventions. Our lives today are not even fathomable (sp) without them. They bring the most mundane of news and the most wonderful news into our lives instantaneously. I think about the "olden days" when news traveled by letter or even word of mouth, and how things were said and done before we ever heard of the possibility. Now we take the cell phone into the bathroom with us in case we miss an "important" call. How ridiculous and dependent we have become.

At 8:39 this morning, my phone rang. Now people who know me know that 9:00 is the best time to catch me up and going, so I figured this had to be a telemarketer or something else. Instead, it was the secretary of my school, calling on the "phone tree." That meant at emergency. I learn from her that a co-worker's husband has had a stroke/annurism and that today they are taking him off life support. They are harvesting his organs for donation, and then she will become his widow. Good morning, Amy.

They live down the street from us, and I've worked with Mary Caroline for may years. She was very dear to me at the passing of my
mother. Their children are my daughters' ages. Now, she is without her spouse. Andy tells me he spoke to him on Sunday, and is shocked himself.

All over town today, the phones are ringing for Jim Chambers. Keep his family in your prayers as they face the coming days.

Being 52

Sometimes lately, I feel like I'm looking at life out of someone else's eyes. I find myself thinking and saying things the "old Amy" would never have done. Here are some reflections of my new mindset:

I get REALLY irritated when someone tells me how I feel or what I think about something. Used to, I'd just stay quiet and let them, but now it is almost a dare to go all over them just to make my point.

My sweet daughters know that "stupid questions" have always gone all over me, but lately, I just will not answer. That is so rude, and so unlike who I've always been - patient, understanding, etc. Not I can barely tolerate people who ask the obvious. I truly think this is due to our society becoming SO mindless that I am overwhelmed at the lack of brain being used. My favorite: "Are you serious?!" No. I'm lying.

I just do not worry anymore (Except for a few dear loved ones) just what people think about me. Oh my gosh - this is from the people pleaser of all time! One particular little woman at church is craving attention and will run you down to get a hug, and I walk right by her.
I'm headed to Hell....

Dana tells me that it's my menopausal brain. I've GOT to read that book. But even if it EXPLAINS why I'm acting like I am, does that EXCUSE it? I mean, school is starting soon and I'll be back around people for long periods of time - I've got to get this back under control. At least during the summer, I've been able to control the majority of my bad behavior, but those days are coming to an end, and I have a reputation to defend.

Do I need hormones? Any suggestions??

Hold me back!!

For the past three years or so, Andy and I have worked on using the Dave Ramsey method of budgeting and getting ourselves out of debt.
While we haven't exactly been "beans and rice, rice and beans", we've made good progress on our average American debt of credit cards and signature loans. Because of that, my surgery expenses out-of-pocket were almost easily manageable, for which we are most greatful.

However, I am in the mood right now to SPEND MONEY!! Big, serious, use-of-plastic, taking big steps backwards spending. Furniture, clothes, yard, you name it, I want it TODAY. I mentioned to Andy last night I'd like to go out today and spend $10,000.00, and I actually think he thought I was part serious.

But I won't. You see, it looks like I have another surgery facing me, and the house needs a new roof. Those two things are daunting, and I will just have to use them for my splurge and delay gratification in other areas.

To quote one of my favorite childrens' story lines, "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!!"

Tony and Eva's wedding

In spite of looks of disgust from my husband, I purchased the - not one, but TWO - editions of OK! magazine that had pictures and details of THE WEDDING. Yes, it was beautiful, in spite of the red wedding cake, but I'll be writing a well-worded letter. There were no pictures of any of the SPURS !! Over and over, we saw the lovely ladies from "Desperate Housewives", but no Manu, Pop, or even the Red Rocket!!

This is one fan who's majorly disappointed!!

Meeting "Dr. Jones"

A few weeks ago, I spoke with a lady from church who'd had her para-thyroid taken out about her doctor. My own tyroid is dead, so I needed to see a specialist, and she'd made favorable comments about him... when I asked, she told me what she'd liked about him, and that she would recommend him. Later, she called me, to tell me that she'd failed to mention that someone she knows felt like he was gay, and that she wanted me to know going into the meeting.

I met him yesterday, and there's no doubt in my mind - he's gay. So gay. I immediately liked him and felt very comfortable with him - he spent about 20 minutes with me - an eternity for a specialist these days. And now I wonder, is it a good thing I was told ahead of time? Would I have been so taken aback by his mannerisms that I would not have listened to what he told me?

Years ago, I would have been repulsed by this man. I would have seen only the lifestyle and not the person - a competent doctor. I would have not wanted him putting his hands on me; I'm ashamed to admit this, but I wonder how tolerant I can become. I'll probably see him once or twice more; it's not like I'm going to be socially in "his circle," but I don't want to become someone who accepts and approves of a lifestyle that I believe is wrong.

I really sound bigotted here, and I don't want to - this is just on my mind a lot. I've got to deal with these ideals on my own. Just venting.

My heritage, revisited

Twice, over the past several months, I've had an opportunity of visit with a couple of people who've known my grandmother and aunts. My grandmother died in 1970, at the age of 70, and so she's been gone a long, long time. When she died, it seemed to me as a teen that she was old - now I know how much longer she could've lived.

To sit and hear people talk of her - and yesterday, of her daughter (my mother's oldest sister Lee) is both comforting and interesting. The lady to who I talked yesterday, told me that my grandmother would go up to the school for something and wear an odd, knitted cap on her head no matter the weather. It would embarrass my aunt to death for her to do that, and I laughed at the thought that, even "back then," parents embarressed their kids. She (my Mamaw) had to have been a young woman then - and yet I only see her in my mind's eye as an elderly saint.

All this brings to mind - what is it my family and friends will say about me when I'm dead and gone? Will my granddaughters wrap lovely stories around them as I have these? Will they be proud to tell people, "Amy LaMore was my grandmother!" ? Will I leave funny stories and stories of good deeds for them to emulate? I can only hope....

Mondays

During the school year, Mondays are not my favorite. They are the start of another hectic week of work - and while I had a really good group of kids last year, I'm at that stage where I'm just tired of working. I know that sounds crazy, but I think it's a change I'm wanting. Those Mondays during school usually come after a wonderful weekend of being home with Andrew and my church family and relaxing.



My summer Mondays, however are just about my favorite day. After a busy weekend full of people, I am coming to love the quietness of Monday. Andy has gone back into his routine, everyone is back at work (save Dana, and she usually sleeps later) and so I have the morning to be by myself. It is a time I am truly coming to look forward to - and just about the time I begin to take it for granted, school will start. A little taste of retirement, I think.

I hope your Monday is going well!

Dana's Decision

From the time she was a little girl, Dana has said she wanted to live on her own. Having never had that - went from Daddy straight to Andrew - I thought that was a pretty neat goal. She's done really well for herself, and no mom could be prouder of a daughter.

Now, she's made the decision to box up her life and head to Houston. My nemesis - the one place on earth I gripe about going, and now the people I most treasure are all going to be living there. The good things about her move are wonderful things, and I know God is working in her life to make this happen, but HOUSTON?!?! Maybe this is God's way of making me repent and look for things to like about the city - other than family being there.

I'm happy for my girl - that school is lucky to be getting her, and I know a marvelous church family awaits her with open arms; not to mention Gregg, Erin and Roarke have her close by.

Please pray for her as she transitions into this new phase - I'd appreciate it a lot!!

Memories

The other night, we were eating with the Huttons, and the topic of our earliest memory came up. Andy, Robert, and Jackie all have very early memories, but mine doesn't come to mind until I am about 4 or 5 years old. I know that I have a lot of memories of that time in my life, because my mom did a lot with me; taking me to school to help sort beans with the cafeteria ladies while she gathered school news for the local paper, and stuff like that, but before then, there aren't any memories.
So, when does your earliest memory pop up? Let me know....

Oh, my word!!!

I watched "The Departed" today for my daily movie time. It won Scorsese a Best Director Oscar, and almost everyone in it was nominated for something as well as Best Picture. If nothing else, I wanted to say I'd seen it, and Andy wasn't interested, so I just went ahead by myself.

Do people REALLY use the F-bomb that much?!?! I mean, the movie would have been half as long just omitting that one word!
How many times does the brain hear it before it becomes desensitized to the sound of that? Even pretty boy Leo DeCaprio spewed it frequently, so unlike his nice guy Jack in Titanic.

Well, now I've seen it. It's in my collection, but it will probably gather a nice layer of dust before it's watched again.

I shoulda listened to my husband!!

Oh, brother!!

I HATE to look dumb. Usually, if I think there's a chance of that happening, I just close my mouth and let it pass. You know, "better to be silent and thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt?" or something like that.

Well, let's just say I'm not always successful at stopping myself.

We have a group of families that began attending our church a few years ago when their congregation "died." They are all the same age and sit together, and I've come to love them all. Recently, one of the women had serious surgery, and I was discussing her case with a friend. She asked me how this lady was related to the others, and as I tried to clarify, my mouth revealed my ignorance.

It seems that, while I've known all these folks all this time, something very basic never dawned on me. The conversation went something like this: (names changed for privacy)

"Now, is she Joe's mother?" "No, she is Paul's and Bob's mother." Is that Bill's wife?" "No, her husband is deceased. You are thinking of Ron's wife." "Isn't HER name Sue?" (Now at this point, I should have just shut up, but....) "She is Ron's wife and Paul's mother."
"No, she is Sue. Joe's mother is Mary." "But I thought Ron's wife was Mary." THINK, Amy, THINK! "Her name IS Mary, but so is Joe's mother!" By now, we both have headaches, and I have come to the awful realization that, even after knowing these three ladies all this time, it NEVER - EVER dawned on me that two of the three had the same name.

Is that pitiful or what....

Missing my girls - and Gregg, too!

Both my sets of kids have been out vacationing lately, and I sure have missed talking to them. I try not to call so much that I'm a bother, or cause them to roll their eyes upon seeing my name on the caller ID, but this inability to just up and call when the mood strikes has been hard on the old mom gene.

Erin and Gregg had a great time on their trip... I'm so glad to know they are able to go and do these trips now before too many responsibilities limit their flexibility. And Dana has had a nice long break from the trials of job hunting to clear her head and relax. Now, we'll see what the week holds for her.

It appears my computer is agreeing to work with the new modem, THANKS, Robert!! I've missed my computer time very much, such a part of my daily routine it had become. It'll take me a while to get caught up, but I will. How spoiled we have become to the technology!

Well, hopefully until tomorrow -

Sleep well!!

Perhaps tomorrow

Well, we're here at the Hutton's, bringing in the 4th of July - in the rain. So much rain the streets are blocked off and the yards look like lakes. After so long in a drought, one hates to complain, but REALLY - we've all had enough of the deluge.

Got two opinions on the old computer - we need a new modem, so we bought one today. Hopefully, I'll be writing from the comforts of my own space tomorrow or whenever we can get it installed.. I've really missed writing and reading the several blogs I keep up with - and I can't wait to become prolific once again.

Dana's in Denver with friends and Gregg and Erin are in NYC for a few days. I'm so happy they are out seeing and doing fun things. Can't wait to hear all about their adventures.

Enjoy this 4th of July - and remember to count our blessings that come from living in this land of the free!!

technology, smecnology!

Blogging from Jackie's. My computer is still down, so here's a quick update.

Had a wisdom tooth taken out today. Glad Dana was here to drive me and dish out icecream. Now if I can just heal without a dry socket. To do again, I'd take better care of my teeth....

Hopefully this weekend, I'll have some answers to the computer problem; we think it's the modem.

Have a great weekend!

Amy

Computers are a curse!

First of all, sorry it's been so long since my last post - my computer will not sign on; saying I have no dial tone. Right - I do have one, so it's internal somewhere and I'll have to wait for Robert to come home and look at it.

I'm north of Dallas at my cousin's. Her brother whom I'm written about passed away, and the funeral was today. Wonderful service, testament of a life lived to the fullest. His mother turns 84 tomorrow, and this is her third child to bury, along with her husband. Bobby Aaron was 57 years old, and leaves a loving wife, son, daughter-in-law, and 3 grandkids along with his mom and siblings. Too soon to die....

WON, SPURS, WON!!

Those of you old enough to remember the Beatles remember that there were basically two types of girl Beatle fans. Some were screamers and jumpers, and the others were cryers and hair-pullers.
I was the cryer-type, and during this past Finals, with my Spurs, I discovered that I still am!!

Lastnight, while everyone was jumping, high-fiving, and yelling; I sat on the couch and soaked it all in!! I was just as excited as everyone else, I'm just not a jumper/screamer. My passion stays internal, personal, intense. ( Wow, that sounds deep.)

We hosted the game, so I was able to just stay in my nest and watch the interviews and such instead of driving home, which was nice. It was hard to sleep afterward, and I would be in front of the tv all day listening to it over and over if Andy were at work, but he's heard all he wants, and we'll do something else.

So, here's my last SPURS blog for a while; thanks to Tim, Tony, Bruce, Manu, Pop, and all the rest for giving us such wonderful entertainment for another season. Thanks for sharing your friendship, commitment, and passion with us, and for showing the world that good guys do win. Take some time off, and come back ready to do a back-to-back; it's the one thing left for this newly born "dynasty" to do.

It was truly fun.

Green, green grass...

Living in South Texas, you become numb to color in the summer. Everything is dull, blah, brown; the color ranging from the light color of the sand that burns your bare feet to the dark, deep brown of old mesquite bark. Leaves that survive hang limp, and the wildflowers bloom and quickly die. Tanks dry up and crack, the thirsty cattle trying to survive. It's the way things usually are, and it has the ability to make you think everywhere is the same.

Today, Andy and I drove to San Antonio to Home Depot - the grown man's Toys R Us. Along the way, I saw several tanks with nice, blue water nearly up to their tops. Cattle standing under trees with lush, full leaves and green grass beneath them made me realize how unusual this is for us in June. The Spring rains have given rise to the world as it should be - and it is beautiful. Wild flowers are fading, but the ones still standing are in profusion and standing tall with their faces to the sun. How long has it been since this was the case?
The summers of drought and scorching heat have numbed us to thebeauty of our climate. I know that July and August may return us to the dryness to which we are familiar, but for now, it is wonderful.

Thanks, God.